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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Feeling so sad, son moving out

5 replies

KittySmith1986 · 11/01/2024 18:29

Hi

He’s 19 and relocating to a new job overseas. He’s going with a colleague, (who’s also a friend).

He is very excited about getting out of the town we live in (nothing wrong with it but his peer group for the most part have moved away/are at university) and he recently split with long term girlfriend.

I’m happy for him, I know he’s sensible but I spent most of yesterday crying, feeling so sad. I’ll miss him so much.

I have read a few other threads on here and I know he’ll be okay and I know I’ll be okay. Just need to know that this feeling is normal and that I’ll get used to it. It doesn’t seem like long ago that he was a child. All my dreams of motherhood (after several miscarriages) came true when he was born and I loved the times we had when he and his sister were young. I think that I suffer with a lot of anxiety around my children (which may be rooted in the miscarriages and my parents deaths which happened when my children were very young).

I’m separated from his dad so I feel a bit alone and don’t really want to burden my friends. From the outside, it’s an exciting new chapter and a normal part of life. I suspect that I have become very afraid of change. I’m 52.

Thank you for reading.

OP posts:
Tulipvase · 11/01/2024 18:37

I think it’s understandable to feel that way. I think your friends would be happy to listen to you and help cheer you up! Give them a try.

DGPP · 11/01/2024 18:44

I think this is normal and I’m sure I will feel like this too.
but you will be ok and you will adjust. Don’t show him your tears - tell him how excited you are for his next chapter and say you’d love him to come home when he wants to and you will visit too!
OP, your life needs to go on. Speak to your friends, think about a partner if you don’t have one, embrace this next chapter for you.
it is a big adjustment but you’ve done a great job. Now is his time to be free

KittySmith1986 · 11/01/2024 18:49

Thank you. He has no idea about my sadness, it would be selfish of me to let him know how I’m truly feeling inside. I feel a mix of sad for me but excited for him! He knows I’ll miss him and that he’ll always have a home with me if needed. I am just calmly supporting him in his decision.

OP posts:
Boatshoes · 11/01/2024 18:50

Sending you love, OP x

lovelyoldtree · 11/01/2024 18:50

It isn't easy. My adult daughter left home some years ago now. I accepted she was leading the life she wanted, and she has done very well.
Something I didn't realise was how much joy I would feel about her adult achievements, and those of my nieces, nephews and their partners. Wishing you and your son well.

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