Roller coaster need a break!

[Mooga123]

I'm utterly exhausted. My son passed his gcse last yr & hes done really well at college but this year its been crazy... I was so pleased when he passsed his test as it meant he could drive himself to college as oposed to me dropping him at station & hanging around late in between working. This was my choice as he had a 40 min train jouney + walk so i didnt want him to cycle to station as well..anyway basically thats where the trouble started he goes out all hours . Its so tough hes at college 4 days & works 3. He gives lifts to mates sometimes late at night & goes training late. I feel like i havet had a proper sleep in ages. Hes a good lad he does keep.me informed & lets me know if hes leaving the house which id rather he did do but this stage is pretty gruelling. The worry of it all is also.immense & the Financial burdon. Im not sure how to bring myself back up to speed because im.wiped out.

Sorry I'm confused - are you wiped out because you are waiting up for him when he goes out ?

Is the financial burdfrom the car cost and petrol?

I dont wait up but i cabt sleep properly until hes in. Fincial cost have been 1st year insurance car & fees at college. Hes recently got work but its the aftermarth..

What college fees is he paying? If he/you can't afford a car then be doesnt have one. I think you have probably wound yourself up into a bit of a state over this. He doesnt HAVE to have a car, you dont HAVE to wait up for him, you don't HAVE to wait at the station for him if you tell him to get the bus.

OP - as far as I can see your DS is doing absolutely nothing wrong. He’s at college, working and giving friends the occasional lift for goodness sake!! It’s not his fault you feel the need to helicopter parent and can’t sleep if he’s out, even though he’s clearly shown you that he’s honest and responsible. You should consider yourself lucky that he communicates so well with you

Re: financial concerns - surely you’d be paying his car insurance and college fees no matter what? You’re the one complaining about not wanting to have to do lifts/cycle to the station. They’ve got nothing to do with what times he’s out?? Very confused.

If he is an adult now he should be allowed to come and go as he pleases as long as he is being respectful to others in the house (meaning be as quiet as a mouse when coming back in and makes sure he locks up).

You being anxious is your issue to solve. I was the same when ds got his car and used the freedom to be out and about late, but you eventually start to sleep again once you get used to it. First thing I do in the morning (or if I get up for a middle of the night pee!) though is still check he is in!