Vaping

[C36M]

My daughter is 16 years old and she has always been really sensible, not one to follow the crowd. However, I’ve just caught her vaping in her bedroom. I know this is the norm for teenagers now a-days but I’m really disappointed and worried about her health. She said that it’s her friend’s vape and she is just looking after it because her friend’s bag was searched at school today.

She said that the only reason she tried it in her room was because she was on the phone to another one of her friends, and they asked her what flavour the vape was.

I don’t believe her, but she’s adamant it’s not hers, she’s very calm about it and has said sorry for having it and for using it. But she wants it back because she has to give it back to her friend tomorrow. I feel like I shouldn’t give it back, but what would you do?

I would throw it out and suspend any pocket money I was giving her.

Oh yes the classic 'it's not mine, I'm looking after it for a friend'. Chuck it out (not where it can be retrieved!) and make it clear that she'll have to sort it out with her friend herself. Tell her vaping in her room or anywhere in the house is not acceptable.

Also I would bet money on her hiding capes in her room. Yes, they are all doing it but honestly I am convinced this is going to blow up in a few years with massive lung/health problems.

The classic I have it because my friends bag was searched. I found a vape in ds’s room whilst cleaning and got the same story. I wouldn’t have caught him actually vaping in his room though as I knock before going in- do parents not do this with girls? I talked to my ds at the time about not wanting him to vape because the long term effects are not known. I wasn’t going to accuse him of lying so left it at that. He works hard at school, is well behaved and he left a friendship group last year because of alcohol and drug use. He didn’t want to be a part of that. So overall, I am not concerned about him. For teens who are usually very sensible, I think talking to them rather than at them is better.