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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

DS 15 broken ankle & struggling

7 replies

boredwithfoodprob · 16/09/2023 21:48

Last week, my DS broke his ankle doing something incredibly silly and dangerous which we had previously warned him not to do. He needed an operation to pin it back and it was a stressful frustrating few days. Anyway, a week or so later, my son is doing well physically but he is almost constantly fed up, angry and quite nasty towards us at times. He moans that he has nothing to look forward to. Before this happened, even at the best of times he would fixate on things and moan about them - eg the weather is too hot, the holiday is too long, his journey to school, teachers at school, the hobbies he does, his lessons, his gym membership etc etc. I feel like this accident is the peak of all the constant moaning that was happening anyway and it's really becoming too much and we're arguing every evening which ruins the rest of the night. We spend all day doing everything for him and trying to help and support him but his anger and frustration is very hard going. How can we deal with this for the next 5+ weeks??! Shock

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NuffSaidSam · 16/09/2023 21:50

Have you told him this? He's old enough to just be told the impact his behaviour is having on everyone else and that it has to stop. Ask him what you can do to help him improve his behaviour. Remind him that he won't be forever (and ultimately it was his own stupid fault!). Treat him like an adult and hope he responds like an adult.

MidnightOnceMore · 16/09/2023 21:53

He's scared himself I bet. If he'd been warned not to do it he will perhaps feel very foolish?

Have you ever got anywhere talking to him about his underlying feelings?

I'd be very strict about rudeness but also keep trying to find out what's going on with him.

SeaToSki · 16/09/2023 21:54

Just walk away if he starts..he cant exactly follow you at the moment.

boredwithfoodprob · 16/09/2023 21:57

NuffSaidSam · 16/09/2023 21:50

Have you told him this? He's old enough to just be told the impact his behaviour is having on everyone else and that it has to stop. Ask him what you can do to help him improve his behaviour. Remind him that he won't be forever (and ultimately it was his own stupid fault!). Treat him like an adult and hope he responds like an adult.

Thank you, yes we do tell him this a lot but he can't seem to help it - it seems to be almost instinctive for him to moan about everything. I have told him that his situation is very temporary but it doesn't seem to make a difference. He's okay (ish) during the day but by the evening he's looking for a row. He's also spending a huge amount of time on his phone so much so that I've put restrictions on it which has made him even crosser😫

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boredwithfoodprob · 16/09/2023 21:59

MidnightOnceMore · 16/09/2023 21:53

He's scared himself I bet. If he'd been warned not to do it he will perhaps feel very foolish?

Have you ever got anywhere talking to him about his underlying feelings?

I'd be very strict about rudeness but also keep trying to find out what's going on with him.

Yes absolutely- he really scared himself and he feels very embarrassed and just sad about the whole thing - he's usually v sensible. I have told him I totally agree understand this but he can't keep on moaning constantly!!!

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RedDawg · 16/09/2023 22:00

You mention gym membership, my gym froze mine for free when I had a broken leg. Also the local travel company refunded me my prepaid train pass. Sorry I know it was not what you were asking. Hope he mends quickly 🌺

boredwithfoodprob · 16/09/2023 22:01

SeaToSki · 16/09/2023 21:54

Just walk away if he starts..he cant exactly follow you at the moment.

He tried to run after me earlier as a kind of threat that he would hurt himself again! It was when I wouldn't take restrictions off his phone (he'd been on it for 8 hours today!)

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