Dd14 constant eating, taking treats, everything

[BadPaintDay]

HELP!

I don't know what to do to help my teen DD.

She EATS everything in sight. Usually starts with any sweets/choocolate/cake etc we have around. There isn't much of this around normally - left overs from parties etc or belonging to my younger DC. Yogurts, crackers, cheese, fruit - lunchboxes for 3 for a week gone in hours. She doesn't care she takes it all. Nothing is safe. We've locked as much away as we can but anything forgotten even for a moment is gone. Even sugar from the sugar bowl is eaten by the spoonful. I can't allow her access to any money at school as she spends it on sweets and cakes no proper lunch, and any cash she has gets spent on sweets on the way home. I suspect she is spending more than she gets in money terms so I think she is taking money from around the house too.

She is gaining weight rapidly. 2 yrs ago she was a ladies dress size 8 - she's now pushing at 16. She has awful stretch marks all over her legs and stomach.

We have tried to access mental health support, she doesn't meet threshold - getting limited help at school but its making no difference.

Before the summer I tried a no sugar 21 days with her. It stopped her for a while but we are right back to square one now and I think many times worse.

She has plenty of access to healthy food, plenty of protein, veg, carbs etc.

She's fairly fit although I'm now noticing a decline - she swims twice a week and is fast. SEN means she doesn't do PE at school.

So any experience... what do we do now? I feel as though we are going to have to lock cupboards in order to keep anything... I don't want to live like that and it is not fair on the younger dc.

Is she unhappy about her weight gain at all OP?
Looks like she needs help but unless she sees it as an issue there is very little you can do except keeping treats very limited at home and dishing it out to all of them and when it is gone its gone.
It's very hard when they take the siblings share. We had this but we persevered with your share and brothers share and it is slightly better now.
It is awfully hard when there are other kids but remember they don't need too much junk too.
Don't do a complete ban..it never works.
How old is she? Do you notice it more around her periods?
Is she generally happy otherwise?

Have you spoken to GP and asked about possible related health conditions? Compulsive overeating doesn’t always come from mental health issues, it could be something like Pradeep-Willi syndrome, especially since you have mentioned SEN. Individuals affected feel constant and overwhelming hunger and need a lot of very specialised support. What you said about her eating lunch box food for three people for a week rings alarm bells - that’s quite extreme. Otherwise I think not demonising any food if you can (no sugar diets can unfortunately just set people up for an unhealthy relationship with food) but trying to encourage a healthy diet and a good amount of exercise, and focusing on a healthy body rather than a slim body. Your GP should be able to help and if necessary refer to the tiered weight management service, although I know there’s a long waiting list in most instances.

Prader-Willi, not Pradeep. Bastarding auto correct!!

I’d be asking the GP for a check up an insatiable appetite could be due to hormonal imbalance, or other medical issues not necessarily a mental health issue.

It's a type of self harm.
Can she talk about how she's feeling ?

I'd stop locking it away and just move to not having it in the house at all. Provide stuff she can eat and stop policing.

Speak to the GP to check for underlying causes.

Can you afford private therapy?

If this emotional: you won't stop it without addressing that.
If this is physical: you won't stop it without addressing that.
If this is part of your DD's SEN diagnosis: you won't stop it without addressing/supporting her on that.

It's presumably not behavioural so a behavioural response won't work.

Thanks all.

Her SEN is should not impact this - though the impacts of the SEN in school are impacting her mental health - anxiety etc. So there may be some indirect connection.

Hormones is a good call - she's currently due on her period which won't be helping. I've been trying all week to get her a docs appointment but keep getting told to "call back tomorrow we have no appointments today!" I don't think it's any of the more dramatic diseases like Prada-Wills as its only really been a thing over the last year.

In terms of not having stuff in / not locking away - I cannot not have anything in at all - I have other dc / we all need to eat. It's not just the sweet stuff she eats- that's just her first choice, but she'll eat huge chunks of cheese (from a standard cheddar block), cooked meat etc - the other day half a loaf of bread and half a pack of fancy tomatoes I'd got out a few mins earlier to use for dinner! We don't have alot of sweet stuff in anyway but how do I deal with Christmas etc.?

I just don't know what else to try.