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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenager

1 reply

Loops87 · 22/06/2023 14:58

So, long story but will try to explain best I can. I’m looking for advice and to see if I’m doing something wrong.

My 16 year has completed exams and now left school. We are moving this Saturday and out of London (which she doesn’t want to do) so she asked if she could go to college in London and stay at my mums on the days she has college (3 day) I thought about it and agreed on the basis that she shows me she can take responsibility for taking care of herself like cooking and cleaning up after herself (my mum is 71 plus it isn’t her job to do it) that was 3 months ago and I’ve had to remind her so many times about the ‘agreement’ and she has shown me she isn’t ready to stay there as I’m still having to tell her to do anything numerous times! I’m so frustrated that she isn’t getting it and makes up all different excuses why she doesn’t do what I’ve asked. For 3 days now I’ve asked her to pack her things up and she hasn’t done it, I understand she doesn’t want to move away but none of us do but we couldn’t afford to buy a house in our area, so we moved as close to London (and train station for her) as possible.

I’ve now told her that I’m not comfortable with her staying at my mums now and she needs to go to a college where we are moving to. She isn’t happy about this and now I feel like the worse mum ever but I have to do what I think is right.

I hope this all makes sense and haven’t bored anyone with this post lol

OP posts:
Maloneyb · 22/06/2023 15:00

OP, teenagers can be tricky at the best of times.

itll feel like they hate you 90% of the time but you’re her mom and you know best. We all learn that when we’re older and need our moms.

help her with the transition of moving but be firm on what you want. You gave her a chance to prove herself and she couldn’t (for your moms sake I totally get it!)

we can’t all get what we want all of the time, it’s a life lesson we all learn.

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