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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Pocket money for 16 year old

33 replies

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 21:33

I know this has been done loads before but how do you decide how much money to give a 16 year old?

He currently gets £20 / month and saves about 1/3 most months.
I pay for phone, clothes (he has no interest in fashion so basic stuff), shoes, barbers, an occasional magazine and a hobby (climbing).

I was thinking of increasing to £50 but he needs to pay for extra clothes, and his social life (which was non existent 3 months ago but is now trips to town for Costa). And any presents for family.

His GCSEs are now finished so can get a job but he thinks I should give him £100/month.

OP posts:

CremeEgg1983 · 17/06/2023 21:35

I give mine £100 a month but that's on the basis that she uses it for bus, takeaways if she wants one, fake tan, nails etc. I still pay for her phone contract and necessary stuff.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 17/06/2023 21:40

We give DS £80 per month, he has to pay for phone credit out of that but we pay for bus tickets to college. I buy basic clothes but he has the option to buy extra

CremeEgg1983 · 17/06/2023 21:41

RhinestoneCowgirl · 17/06/2023 21:40

We give DS £80 per month, he has to pay for phone credit out of that but we pay for bus tickets to college. I buy basic clothes but he has the option to buy extra

Same with mine. I'll buy stuff she needs but if she wants some ridiculously priced clothing item then she has to save for it herself.

UsingChangeofName · 17/06/2023 21:43

but he thinks I should give him £100/month.

I hope you laughed.

Has he explained why he thinks you should suddenly increase his pocket money five fold, when he is old enough to go out and earn his own money ?

HappiDaze · 17/06/2023 21:47

DD and DS get £80 a month each but use it for buses, eating out and whatever they need.

I'll pay for basics ie most clothing although DD uses her £ towards extra clothes and all sorts of crap I'd never pay for.

I pay for phone contract as it's added onto mine so much cheaper.

I'm pretty sure DS saves more than he spends as he never buys extra clothes like DD

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 21:49

UsingChangeofName · 17/06/2023 21:43

but he thinks I should give him £100/month.

I hope you laughed.

Has he explained why he thinks you should suddenly increase his pocket money five fold, when he is old enough to go out and earn his own money ?

I did laugh!

I have pointed out he could be earning £5 / hour or more at the supermarket / cinema / chip shop.

OP posts:

Dacadactyl · 17/06/2023 21:49

How much effort has he put in for his GCSEs? How taxing are the subjects he's picked for A-Levels?

DD16 is costing us around 100 a month on socialising and make up alone (not including clothes, phone contract, extra curriculars, savings) Her grandma gives her another 20 quid a month on top. However, she has put in maximum effort with her exams, is respectful and helpful round the house and is going to be taking tough A-Level subjects.

If she was rude, not working hard for exams or planning on doing easier a-levels, I'd be making her get a job quick smart.

I think it depends on how much socialising he does and whether, if you worked it out, is he currently costing you similar?

BTW, this is my 2nd draft of this post. Initially I'd written something along the lines of "is he taking the mick?" But when I thought about it DD is deffo costing us 100 quid a month on just socialising and make up 😮

Multipleexclamationmarks · 17/06/2023 21:53

Mine gets £30 a month then I bung her a bit extra to buy birthday/Xmas gifts with.
I pay for phone contract, bus fares, all clothes, lunches, toiletries etc so it's just socialising money.

BillyNoM8s · 17/06/2023 21:54

15 year old DSSs get £80 a month plus usually £20 from their mum. I'm amazed yours has any scrap of £20 left to save.

We also pay for phone, clothes and they have a valid cinema pass. They both still had zero funds before June 10th

They had oh shit moments about fathers day and a birthday they haven't budgeted for but tough luck. I'm hoping their shame at being empty handed will help them improve their savings habit, but doubt it.

Ideally they need weekend jobs.

If you can afford to increase it then I would.

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 21:56

He has worked hard for his GCSEs. A Level choices not decided yet, probably maths and sciences. DP has promised an incentive for good grades.

He hadn’t been doing much socialising recently as has been revising but I don’t want to fund daily trips to town for coffee, cake and toasties!

I will be saving his school dinner money over the next 5 weeks so should maybe let him have that but that gets complicated if I then want to remove it in August.

OP posts:

RhinestoneCowgirl · 17/06/2023 21:58

DS is in year 12 (summer born) and is currently doing 4 A-levels, so we're happy for him to concentrate on studying at the moment rather that getting a part time job, and we can afford to give him allowance. He doesn't take the piss and works hard at college.

Dacadactyl · 17/06/2023 21:59

@tourdefrance it's hard, particularly if he's only just started spreading his wings and heading out to socialise for the first time. You don't want to kibosh that because its good for him.

If you can afford to increase it, I personally would, given what you've said about him.

If you can't afford to then getting a job will do him no harm.

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 22:14

I can afford it but want him to understand the value of money as he currently seems to think it grows on trees, doesn’t look after his stuff as we can just ‘buy a new one’ and thinks he doesn’t need to get a job until he leaves uni.

I am happy he is doing some socialising (funded by a tenner here and there from his dad not the £20 / month) just trying to find a balance.

He did get paid £5 to mow the lawn today so he could certainly do that weekly for the rest of the summer.?

OP posts:

CremeEgg1983 · 17/06/2023 22:16

@tourdefrance What if you set household jobs for him to do to earn it? Like clean the bathroom etc

Dacadactyl · 17/06/2023 22:17

Yes, that's a good idea. Get him doing with some jobs like that, cleaning the bathroom, washing the car, taking bins out, ironing, anything you don't want to do, to earn a bit extra.

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 22:23

He already has some jobs that he’s expected to do - recycling, laundry, loo roll stocking, dishwasher, cooking once a week.

I was joking with DP that we were getting a cleaner from Monday but DS wasn’t keen. He might be if we offered to pay. DP made sure he had done a proper job with the lawn today.

OP posts:

Iamkitty · 17/06/2023 22:25

£50 per month, but I.pay for his phone and clothes. It's for trains, lunches etc

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 22:28

Is that trains to school or trips with friends? Lunches with friends or also at school/ college?

OP posts:

whiteroseredrose · 17/06/2023 22:29

DH was in charge of pocket money and used to give DS and DD double their age, so at 10 they got £20 per month and £32 at 16. No idea why he did that.

Neither got jobs at 6th Form, DS because the pocket money was enough, DD because there wasn't much around due to Covid.

fleur89 · 17/06/2023 22:35

I used to get £10 per week (~£40pm) at his age and that was 17 years ago... I mostly saved it though and was very careful with money. To earn this I'd have to help around the house a bit, nothing major - tidying my room, cleaning out the rabbits, etc. I'd say £20pm is too little these days.

Parents paid for necessities, such a phone, clothes if they were a need (if a want then it would be for birthday etc), make up, etc.

Going out would come out of my allowance, but mostly we just hung out at the park or at other friends' houses so this wasn't particularly expensive. Some of it went on alcohol for house parties, I must admit 😂 We'd get those with older siblings to get hold of it for us!

Iamkitty · 17/06/2023 22:38

The odd train to school (tube), lunches with friends. I pay for school dinners. But he'll feed himself over the holiday. Cinema, ice creams, nandos etc

Original poster

tourdefrance · 17/06/2023 22:38

I’m definitely going to increase it. He’s only just turned 16 and I increase every birthday month. Just trying to decide if it’s £50 or more and what to include/ exclude.

OP posts:

fleur89 · 17/06/2023 22:42

I'd exclude travel to school and Monday to Friday lunches for sure. In my opinion pocket money should be "fun money" to do what you please with rather than a cost of living allowance. Eg for savings, brunch with friends, hiring a basketball court on a Saturday with friends, going to the cinema, going for a coffee & cake, saving up for a new pair of trainers that he doesn't technically "need", buying a ticket to a festival, etc

Boysdancetoo · 17/06/2023 22:46

Mine gets £100 per month and I pay £20 phone contract and for dance lessons/equipment. I buy basic clothes and all school uniform.
He has a part time job earning £8 per hour but this is seasonal and a zero hours contract. He usually saves half this wage but if he has an expensive month, this month has Father’s Day and a few birthdays to pay for, he saves less.

Notateacheranymore · 17/06/2023 22:53

Regarding deciding what to include - work together. Sit down with him and get him to work out what he spends per month. Tell him you’ll pay a certain %, value or number of things, and have it written with both signatures. Use a fridge magnet to keep it on show daily, and if need be you can point to it - either reinforcing what you do/don’t pay for, or what his obligations are to get the money that he can spend at will.

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