Ds thinks he may have learning problem

[Miracle29]

Ds is nearly 16 and due to leave school soon. After lockdown, his teacher at the time said he was putting him in interventions as he feels there may be a learning block there but not sure what, was how he put it. They tested for dyslexia but that showed up fine. After lockdown I tried chasing everything up and being passed all around and they just said they'll keep him in interventions. Since my ds says he struggles, I've emailed and rang and never get a reply at all. His English teacher is only just starting to help him after over a year of dismissing him but with gcse lurking, I feel its too late. My ds had an interview with college and really struggled to answer questions or express anything and said he felt judged and stupid, as the tutor was quite abrupt. Now we face the fact of he doesn't get the grades he'll struggle to get in college. He doesn't know what he wants to do and had no help and support there either so basically just picked something just to try get a place in college.
Basically ds struggles with holding information. In English tests he'll read something then try to answer the question but forgets what he's read or his answers don't relate to the question or he repeats himself but in a different way. He's socially shy unless around friends. Struggles to find what he wants to say sometimes. If he doesn't understand what someone is asking he will ask them to repeat just to give himself time to find the right answer. You can sometimes ask him something simple and he looks through me like he's no clue. I've asked the school for support so many times and get nothing other than they'll put him in interventions but only when it suits them. I really cannot do anymore with this school and feel they've really failed him. Does this sound like something is going on with ds to those who have experience and if so where do I go now? Ds feels like it's too late. He is the youngest in his year so really should be leaving next year. Any advice. Thankyou

It sounds like he may have a speech / language disorder, this doesn't have to be to do with how he talks, it can be a problem with receptive and expressive language abilities. Obviously I don't know if this is the case but it rings bells with me and reminds me of a friend's son who has developmental language disorder.

I would try and get him assessed by a speech and language therapist, privately if you can afford it, as trying to get it on the NHS may prove very difficult.

You could also try and apply for an EHCP as the assessment would then be done by the council and he could access courses at college for learners with this type of difficulty.

It sounds a bit to me like processing speed issues or working memory issues
If possible try for a private education psychologist assessment

Thankyou to both of you. I've never heard of those. I always thought speech and language was how someone speaks and pronounces words so thankyou. I've googled different things but never really found anything that suits. He did go through early screening when he was 3 as when he started nursery they noticed he wouldn't play with others and would often sit under the table. Constantly reorder things like trains, lego etc but was dismissed by the health visitor as normal. He's always needed extra help at school but at high school it's just been hit and miss and they don't seem to want to help me at all. If anything they look at me like I'm stupid when I mention on parents evenings. This became nore apparent to me when in the college interview and he didn't understand questions, answers weren't relevant to questions etc, I had to step I'm quite often as the tutor seemed to think he was just lazy and not interested but I could tell he was confused.

I would definitely look into both types of private assessment mentioned, if you can afford it. If you think he may be autistic you can get that privately assessed much more quickly than via NHS too if you can afford it.

I would also speak to his GP about all of this and see what they say. Even if you go private tour concerns need to be on his health record.

I second either educational psychologist or speech and language. I tutor a young lad with cognitive processing difficulties. Sounds similar

Auditory processing disorder

Private Ed psych for a Wisc V assessment will get you the info you need. It sounds like a working memory and processing issue to me which, quite frankly should have been picked up years ago.

A spiky profile so struggling in some areas and doing better in others is typical of ASD as is the struggling to answer questions or not realising the question is meant for him so have a little look into that, it presents in lots of different ways not just the stereotypical ones we see in the media.

Exactly this. My DS was exactly like yours. He struggled all through primary school and I pushed for assessment but was told he was just heedless and didn't listen. He could read perfectly well but had no clue what he had read afterwards.
He was great at maths, art and science but anytime he was expected to do writing or comprehension he would perhaps write one sentence then get in trouble for not trying.

Within a half term at high school he was being assessed by educational psychologists. The school was great with him and he got a lot of help. He simply could not process information either from text or verbal information. He was also slightly dyslexic and on the lower end of AS. He did pass GCSE'S but not in English. He is a chef now and has a really good job.

I have a form of dyslexia and ADHD. I have all those issues.

Ask him if thinks in words or pictures, I think in 3D and have to translate words into a kind of storyboard and then back into words.

That's terrible that it's got this far (as in the GCSEs are literally starting now) and the school haven't helped him.
If his grades turn out low personally I would suggest next year he does Maths and English at college (functional level if needed) and then the year after that switch to a different course if that's what he wants to do. So he will have 3 years at college. That extra year might also help him figure out what exactly he wants to do rather than picking a college course "just because".
Everyone is entitled to 3 years of college up to age 19 so he should do that extra year.

Thankyou for all tour advice it's been really helpful. When this was first brought up by his head of year I was relieved that they were attempting to sort it and I get lockdowns affected things but as soon as he went back I had to ring to make sure he was in interventions and they assured me he would be and they'd put him in one here and not there. I've emailed and rang so many times and told them my concerns. They said they can't see dyslexia and just think that basically because he's the youngest in his year, so really shoudl be starting his last year I'm spetember, this was the problem. His maths has come on tons but his English isn't. I spoke to his teacher who basically told me he was lazy and didn't listen and I had to abruptly stop her and explain the situation. She had absolutly no clue he was struggling so then made a plan but this was 2 weeks ago and far too late in my opinion. I emailed again last week with no response at all. My ds tells me he thinks he's stupid and it's so upsetting.

He is hopefully doing t levels as college so he can resit exams of needed and college have said if he doesn't like the course he can swap it and there will be support there but I don't want him to struggle. This school focuses more on the more advanced children and it really annoys me. My ds is good at school, never bothered anyone always had good reports for behaviour but they still can't support me. I wonder of I can ring the sen team at school, do you think they may help?

This.

Don’t put your child future on hold waiting for the school or CAMHS to provide a free assessment as that would only happen if the problem your child has is extremely severe or if he is getting behind at school big time (like being at a level of a child 3 years younger)

Go private, it is worth every penny. When DS had his assessment it cost around £600, which may seem a bit expensive but if it was a repair needed by the car you may not think it twice.

The assessment report came with a wealth of advice and recommendations that were priceless and that could be easily implemented at school or by me at home.

Yes ring the Sendco and ask for a meeting.
Be very factual and focus on the future not on their past failings.
Take notes with you detailing all the areas DS struggles with.

However, realistically there's very little they can do now if he is sitting his GCSEs now, exam access requests had to be in months ago (unless for things like broken arms and needing a laptop).

What I would do is ring the college and ask for a meeting with their SENDCO now, before he starts in September so support can be put in place for him.

From a teacher pov it's difficult to tell the difference between lazy and struggling, when students can't even be bothered to try the work and say it in that way, ofcourse in reality that's due to avoiding failure, if you don't try you can't fail but the appearance is often laziness and lots of teachers don't have that much experience of Send beyond a quick PowerPoint.

It absolutely integral to his self esteem that you find something outside of academia that he can thrive at, that he knows he is good at. Whether that's a sport, tinkering with bikes or cars, landscaping etc, if he can get a summer job doing something physical it'll do him the world of good.

I have adhd and dyslexia and have the same issues. Please get him tested so that the right support can be implemented in college. Also book a session with the college careers adviser and let him sit their tests to work out potential courses based on interests and strengths. At this point he needs professional careers advice rather then a parent blindly trying to unpick a future.

We saw a careers advisor at the college after the interview and she went through a few options but my ds just did not know at all, we went through many things. They basically said he can enroll on the course he's already chose and then they do a swap don't drop session where if the child does not like their chosen course they can swap to a different one and by this time they may have some thought on what they may like to do after being at the college and experiencing the whole thing. After his exams he'll get another interview with the college who go theough results and what is next. They have said they will support where they can. My ds has said he's scared that if he does have a learning difficulty then the college may not accept him or if there are too many who have applied for the course, they'd drop him first and I have explained this cannot happen. My son now has the 'I'm going to fail' or maybe 'I'm just stupid'. I've reassured him that he certainly is not and if there is a problem we can deal with it. He's scared of being labeled and treated differently and this just breaks my heart that he thinks this way. I've pretty much begged the school to help and they promise they will, gives me a certain date of interventions etc and thends comes home and says he's not being collected for the interventions.

So for T levels he needs what? 4s & 5s including English & maths? They are a level 3 qualification.

If he doesn't meet the entry criteria, or even if he does, he could do a 'foundation year' at level 2. He could find his feet at college, resit maths/English, whilst also finding out more about how he learns and how to do assignment based courses.

You could pay for a private assessment which will tell you underlying ability as well as processing speeds, receptive language etc etc. When we did this for DD in y12 it was amazing she had managed as well as she did at school. Her underlying ability was in the 90s but various of her scores were in the bottom 10% and even 5% and 1%.

There are such a variety of potential issues.

My DD1 often fails to answer the question asked. Her mind is the exact opposite of a cross referenced filing cabinet. It is like you have taken all the papers out and thrown them around the floor. She picks up the first piece of paper that is vaguely relevant and replies with that. Only be detailed questioning can you get the true answer. (Which makes some things seem like an inquisition at times).

DD2 on the other hand can answer questions, not necessarily in much detail unless prompted, but takes time and can't always find the right words. It's like her brain operates at a generally slower speed and the 'word retrieval' bit is a bit wonky. For example in her late teens she once referred to the 'arms of a tree' rather than branches.

Well I've just rang the sen at school just to speak with them and they've basically said he had help in primary school for 2 years and then 1 year of help with them but not under sen. He has not being flagged up by any teachers as having problems and there is nothing more they can do basically and they put it down to pressure of gcse and loss of education in lockdown, so with that in mind I can't do no more where the school are concerned and they said if they have no concerns, I cannot flag it with the college because nothing is on file with them that will be past to the college. If I was to go through the gp, what is the process? I'd love to have him privately assessed bit it's not something I can afford right now or else I'd be straight on the phone. I know it's a waiting list but maybe if I can get him on the list I can then speak with the college and say school have no concerns but I do and I'm having him assessed. Would this work? The school won't even pull him out to talk with him and see if they can support him. I've told them I've emailed and rang so many times with wither no response or we will sort it but nothing has been done.

If he is about to do gcses there probably isn't much the school can do for him at this time.
Your best bet is college or private I suspect.

The school are talking rubbish, probably to cover their own backs.

You can contact the college and ask their SENDCO to call you and/or set up a meeting. It's super common for issues to not present until the child is finally under pressure and can no longer cope. You can absolutely get support in place before he starts, support is needs based not diagnosis based.

The downside of going on the NHS waiting list at his age is that hell age out and end up being transferred to the adult list and be back at the bottom of it.

Definitely speak to the college SENCo / learning support department. Ask them if they can assess him once he has joined if at all possible, and also go and see GP in the meantime and ask for him to be referred on to speech and language / community paediatrician. This will potentially take a very long time but at least college will be aware if the GP has decided it's appropriate and may make them more likely to do their own assessment.

You can also apply for an EHCP yourself - look on your local council website to see what the process is. Or check the IPSEA website which is very useful and has template letters to use.

Aged 16 and sitting his exams in the next few weeks is not the time to be starting to worry. You will have had plenty of mock grades and end of year scores which indicated that your ds was not doing well.

Unfortunately not. I had a report to say his grades were average and they would continue to work with him to get them up by doing interventions which they started late and forgot to include my ds so I had to ring them to remind them twice. He then did some mocks and got what was expected in maths but his English was actually a grade 1 and I have been trying to get him help since then. I had no idea until parents evening and I explained he needed extra help, he wasn't lazy or being awkward, he just doesn't understand how to do it. She then said she'd make a plan and started that plan only 2 weeks ago. The school promised me interventions would start in January and my ds was chosen for them. Nothing was heard so I rang them a few weeks after the supposed start date and it was pushed to Feb. Then he was in interventions here and there. The teachers even blamed my ds for nit turning up when he didn't know when, where or times because he wasn't told.

Update: rang the sixth form college ds applied for and explained everything. I was on the ohine for 40 minutes! They were really helpful. They've said they do a taster session in June where they get to pick up to 3 subjects they want to try out for the day. Inbetween this he will be taken out to talk to an advisor about what he likes etc and they'll also ask about any learning problems and she said he needs to say he thinks he does have one and explain abit about it. They will then start thelwir own tests if he gets in and go from there. If he doesn't get the grades he needs for the course they can do transition course so he can resit before going onto the actual course. He needs at least 5 gcse at grade 3 or above. She did mention applying for another college as they start from level 1 and the sixth form is level 3 or btech, t level etc but he's just not interested in the other colleges at all but this one. They promised they'll support him and if something is found, they'll give him extra time for coursework etc. I feel better knowing I've actually been listened to and we could get an answer from the college.