Am I crazy for thinking of moving DD(14) to a different school mid-way through her GCSEs?
DD has ADHD combined type and has struggled massively at her current high school. Her academic work has improved a lot since she started medication, but she is very eager to please and be liked by her peers but struggles with social cues, which has left her open to being targeted.
She has been subjected to bullying since Y8, which shows no sign of letting up. She's just been unceremoniously dropped by her most recent group of so-called friends for being "annoying, a suck up and boring" (I was party to their facetime call, unbeknownst to them) and they're now twisting the knife by targeting her in school. She has made friends with about 3 different groups of kids over the years, but they've all dropped her (some even threw eggs at her, she's bullying/ridiculing social media accounts set up etc.) and she has spent a lot of time being ridiculed or bullied at their hands. She has a habit of gravitating towards groups including "mean girls" and some behavioral problems, and when I talk to her about it she says that they're the only ones that want to hang around with her, my heart hurts so much for her. The most recent group even included her previous bully who made her life hell for almost 2 years - I asked her why on earth she was hanging around with her, and she said it was better to be her friend than her enemy, which I get, but it was very frustrating - and now look where we are. She got very close to one girl at the start of high school, but they were both at the receiving end of bullying, and moved schools as a result. They are still in touch, but she has understandably made a new group of friends, and she boards, so you can imagine has become very close to some of the girls. DD obviously feels as though she has lost her too.
She is a good kid; funny, gregarious, loyal - but kids, especially girls it seems, struggle to gel with her.
I've tried and tried with the school; sanctions are put in place for the culprits as and when but they then lapse and we're back to square 1, she's been to school counseling and is now on the waiting list to be seen again etc. My parents offered for her to go private, and a reasonably local one has been recommended, but when I broach this with DD (which I have done a few times now) she is adamant she wants to stay put, and not "let them win". She also feels like it is worse to be the new girl. But after yet more drama at school, I honestly feel like the only way forward is for her to have a fresh start.
She is a very resilient little thing and has put up with so much over the years, but brushes it off and is her excitable giggly self within a few days of each crisis - but I can see how she is being ground down by all of this (stress manifests itself physically in DD, she suffers from chronic tic disorder, which is rearing its ugly head more and more these days) and her self-esteem is really suffering.
Teenagers can be such absolute shits.