I am so exhausted with the emotional toll of parenting teens. DD 19 is doing ok, just got back from uni as restarting in Sept but plenty of ambition and plans, had fair share of mental health issues with her but seem to be out the other side. DS17 is ticking every box for being a teen, I feel like he needs constant input and support. He has ADHD which means he does need more help and that's fine but he just does so little to help himself. He is not depressed, he is not anxious, he is actually quite happy with things as they are. He attends college, reasonable attendance score although skives off quite a bit, but should come out with a BTEC if carries on as he is. Outside of this he basically lies in bed. He eats too much. He is gaining weight but doesn't care. He is still growing but it's slow growth, not shooting up or anything and the fact he is gaining weight (is now overweight) suggests he isn't needing the extra calories. His appetite is affected by his meds but he only has them on college days, he eats so much at weekends and at night, buys himself rubbish, generally not too much "bad " stuff at home (he buys that himself), just lots of food - pasta, eggs, sandwiches, cereal. He does no activity / sport, a year ago was really into rugby but didn't go back this season. One thing he enjoys is being in a band but this only takes up a couple of evenings a month at the moment. He has a part time job, meant to do two shifts a week. Today he called in sick, despite me saying he was not to, as he is "too tired" to go. I am really cross with him for cancelling, how can he be too tired to work, when he does barely anything outside of college. He has no idea what he wants to do in the future and has no drive to do anything. He does go out with friends at weekends. Vapes, smokes, drinks. All the usual. That's what all the money he earns goes on, we no longer supplement it with "pocket money" due to it just being spent on his vices. He saves nothing and never has spare to buy things like clothes / shoes. This partly due to ADHD and I try to encourage saving but he just can't seem to do it. I am constantly trying to be supportive to him and encourage him and talk about healthy lifestyle etc. I rarely get cross, we have a really good relationship and he is honest with me. I do everything I can to help him keep his job as I feel it is really important for him to do this but wonder at what point I just have to let him get on and be who he wants to be right now, "it's my life" but it is just so hard to watch him doing so little.