Stepson

6 replies

PhilC1950 · 10/02/2023 17:32

Hi all. New to this but desperately need help/advice
I've been with my wife 6 years ( married for 3). Inherited 3 stepchildren. Boy (now17), girls ( now 16 and 9). The girls are lovely and I get on great with them. The boy however is and always has been a nightmare. He moved out of the family home 4 years ago to live with his dad.
Recently he has taken to stealing money from us. When confronted he lied about taking money ( upwards of £150 ish).
I installed a camera to provide evidence and I've caught him red handed. When confronted he kicks off, shouts and swears at us but more disappointingly his mum defends him saying I was wrong putting up a camera.
I cannot get past the fact he's done this without any form of remorse or an apology.
I feel there will be an escalation at some point and I'll swing for him. If that happens it may just be the end of my marriage

OP posts:

Ihatepcos · 10/02/2023 17:37

Does your wife discipline him at all?

Are you being serious about hitting him?

Nimbostratus100 · 10/02/2023 17:40

if you hit him you could go to prison.

Maybe you should end the marriage and get yourself out of this situation

Fedupofdiets · 10/02/2023 17:43

I also think there is no alternative than to leave and get away from the situation. I have a 18 year old son and would be furious if he stole from me and I cannot understand why your wife would defend him but there it is. The fact you feel you want to hit him is enough, the situation won't improve.

Irishbell · 10/02/2023 17:46

I banned DSD from our home because of the exact situation that you’re describing. DH did not give proper consequences or boundaries and it became unsustainable. You need to tell your wife that she either gives consequences or he simply is not allowed into your home. Why should you have a thief in your own home?

Original poster

PhilC1950 · 10/02/2023 18:13

I'm pretty certain that my wife has given him a talking to but it's never in front of me.
I don't think I could actually hit him but if I'm provoked I would lose my cool.
He's had countless chances off me but he's never really had any discipline. He's a typical teenager, knows everything, unbelievably arrogant and very disrespectful to pretty much everyone

OP posts:

DarkDarkNight · 11/02/2023 10:44

My first step would be to stop leaving large amounts of money lying around when you know there’s a thief around. You shouldn’t have to in your own house of course, but keep any money secured.

There needs to be consequences for his behaviour, but if his mum is not willing to do that when she has seen evidence I don’t know what more you can do.

Flip