Thoughts

[Flipflop23]

Son is at uni (he is 19)
he categorically says he’s moved out and will not be moving back home. He says I can do what he wants with his room. (Not that I have done anything with it)
he visits every 5/6 weeks. He always brings his girlfriend with him which I don’t have an issue with although sometimes it’s a bit inconvenient.
when they do come they spend all there time in there room. Even eat in the bedroom.;the only time we see them is if they get food or are about to go out.
my issue is he says this is not his home
but tells me when he’s coming (doesn’t ask) and doesn’t spend much time with us. Feels a bit like we are used as a doss house.
would you say anything?

If I'm feeling used, yes, I'd say something. Maybe something along the lines of when he comes, you never see him, he never spends any time with you. He's made it clear it's not his home. When it's not his home, he has to check with those whose home it is if a visit is convenient and you'd appreciate it if he'd check with you first to see if it suits and it might not always.

Think about it carefully though. If you talk to him and he decides not to come and stay anymore, will you mind? Is it a risk you want to take?