Possible ADHD in DD 15?

[january123]

Since DD has been little she has always been different to her peers - seemingly super confident, articulate and driven. But never quite fitting in with people and struggling to retain friends.

Fast forward to now; Year 10. Mentally she is really struggling, really anxious, massively falling behind at school.
We have had meetings with the school but DD feels no better. In her words it is impossible to focus or concentrate in any of her subjects (despite her love of Drama and English), she doesn't get what they want of her and therefore isn't keeping on top work. This in turn fuels her anxiety and sadly she considers herself thick and a write off who will fail all her GCSEs. This couldn't be further from the truth but the fact is if we don't help her soon she may very well do badly, not to mention the increasing impact on her MH.

Does this sound familiar to anyone? I feel so sad and worried for her. Her symptoms seem quite similar to inattentive ADHD but not sure what to do. I understand an NHS referral could take a long time and she needs help quickly.

It’s really hard to tell. It could be ADHD, or autism, or an anxiety disorder. Or additional learning needs that haven’t been diagnosed. Or possibly even just being in bad habits, procrastination etc.

I really think an opinion from a psychiatrist or psychologist would be best. If you pay for ADHD assessment and she doesn’t have it you’re no further on, and have wasted time looking at the wrong thing.

I should add she is in a lovely independent school with small classes and a very nurturing approach to learning. So not as if she's one of 30 in a class.

I really don't think it's procrastination, she is extremely driven in other areas, massively emotional and volatile. Always talking, highly opinionated -

Sorry keep thinking of more...

Her bedroom would make Tracy Emims look like a 5 star hotel! No matter how much I tidy or help her organise it is constant pit. She can never find anything but is always wanting to aquire more stuff. It upsets and overwhelms her

Well no harm in making the referral to your local Camhs service.

If you did pay for private psychiatrist, chose one that had some experience in neurodevelopmental disorders so that they will at least pick up ADHD or suspect ASD (that is never diagnosed in one go) and hopefully provide you with some answers as in if it is not ADHD then what is it ? (If anxiety or other can make this diagnosis and suggest treatment options - which is not just medication!)

Good luck!

That does sound quite like me at that age op and I have adhd. It's worth speaking to a psychologist and psychiatrist to see what they think.

Has she always been a bit daydreamy or easily distracted or does it seem more recently onset.

This sounds very familiar to me. My daughter was a high achiever at primary, coped fine with the start of secondary and then found Year 10 very challenging just as you described. It was really awful and I feel for you and your daughter as I know exactly what it’s like. It took me a while to get to the bottom of it but she has now been diagnosed with ADHD (inattentive) and is taking Concerta which has made a big difference.

She’s in Year 11 now and I’m feeling much more optimistic about GCSEs after really worrying how she would cope at this point last year.

We did have to go private but had an initial consultation which helped to see if it was worth pursuing so it wasn’t a massive initial outlay although it does end up costing quite a lot. Please send me a DM if you would like more details.

Thank you @Faffydaffy
I will DM you

Sounds like my dd ahe 15. She's currently undergoing assessment for adhd.

My daughter is 15, and was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD back in October.

She's always been bright but her recent grades were so much lower than expected. My husband suspected ADHD, he has it too although his isn't the inattentive type.

Long story short, we had to have her seen privately, and she was given the diagnosis. She started on medication and it's really helping her although we've yet to hit the correct dose for her. Her recent mock GCSE results were so much better than her previous grades.

Please feel free to ask me anything.

Yes!!!! This was my son exactly. Used to say he was on the periphery of his friendship group. Did well at school up until year 10 and then really changed as he struggled so much with revision etc. he was the year they awarded GCSE results so he did ok and just about managed to get decent ALevel grades. His bedroom is exactly how you describe your daughter's. I always felt he was a bit different to his peers but couldn't really figure out why. He's not autistic.
He was the one who mentioned ADHD to us when he was 17. GP said he can't refer to CAMHS as would be too old by time referral came around and too young for adult services. We decided to pay privately and he was diagnosed with ADHD. He was 18 by then so the consultation was private with the consultant. I have recently read the report as he sent me a copy and it is heartbreaking to read just how much he was struggling.
Took a couple of tweaks to get his medication right but I can honestly say he is like a different person now. Don't get me wrong he still struggles a bit but a million miles away from where he was.

Thank you for shari g your story. Can I ask how you went about getting a private assessment?

@january123 I just googled private ADHD consultants in my area.

Thank you.
I have also long suspected my DH has undiagnosed ADHD or similar. How did you go about getting your DD assessed? I don't think we have much time to waste

After a lot of research, my husband decided that Dr Datta at London Psychiatric Clinic would be suitable (my husband is a GP). We had to get a letter of referral from our GP - we just used the e-consult service to request this and the letter was there the next day for us to collect.

Me, my husband and daughter then had to complete a questionnaire each, and the school had to complete one too. Once the clinic had all of this information, a Zoom meeting was set up. Our daughter was diagnosed with ADHDi, and was given treatment options. She wished to commence medication, so a prescription was sent the next day. Her medication is still being titrated and we have regular Zoom meetings with Dr Datta to assess her.

Obviously this isn't a cheap option. The fees are listed on the website of the service we used www.londonpsychiatry.clinic

I hope this is of some help.

This sounds so like my dd13 I could have wrote it myself! She appears super confident, decent at school work, sporty etc but she struggles to maintain friendships & has an odd way of behaving & speaking. (She often stutters & gets her sentences muddled up & is very loud) Her bedroom & work space is also extremely messy. As a toddler she struggled with too much noise & also has been a terrible sleeper until starting secondary school (often taking 2-3 hrs getting to sleep). No diagnosis as yet as shes coping atm & not overwhelmed but I just feel there is something like adhd we need to be looking at here. My worry is as she gets older she'll struggle alot more? Hope you get the help you need for your dd, let us know how you go. You are not alone with this. Good luck

Have you been to the GP or spoken to the school?

Hi ,
I could have written this myself. My 15 Year old DD is going through this ATM . Previously high achieving and high motivation all of a sudden finds it hard to even start assignments. She is so down on herself. I suspect ADHD as like your daughter she has always been disorganised and a really messy
Have you managed to have your daughter assessed? . We are waiting for a private appointment next month ( not UK) .
I'd love to know what was your outcome.

Hi, I’m tagging on to this thread to ask some advice. I suspect my 16 year old daughter has ADHD. Some of the descriptions on here really resonate- horrific untidiness, awful room, procrastination, school going off a cliff at GCSEs etc. I had thought a new school for sixth form would help, but the first report has shown late homework and poor attitude to learning. She’s ambitious and wants to go to university but I’m worried she’s already burning bridges with the new school. I’m also worried that even if she pulls it together again for a levels, she wouldn’t cope with a degree. Previous calls for advice on here suggested adhd but I just couldn’t get my head round it, especially as our relationship was pretty dire at the time. I’m now thinking that we should explore it.
My big problem is, how to approach it? How do I bring up the subject without her freaking out? How have other people talked to their children about getting assessed without them feeling like there’s something wrong with them and making things worse? And what if she comes up negative?? She’s often very resistant to help.

Hi @Gauragaura

maybe it might be good to start your own thread, focusing on your daughter’s issues and hopefully people can give more relevant advice.

my girl is 15 and has been diagnosed with autism and ADHD. The autism was initially suggested by Camhs after she was referred for self harm, I spoke to her about it and she was initially resistant and we only pursued a diagnosis, luckily we could go private, when she felt ready.

i never considered Adhd (also hadnt seen the autism, she was a very ‘normal’ young child) but knew there was a big overlap with autism and her teachers had started to raise concerns she seemed zoned out, her fave subjects she is massively invested in but others she struggles despite being motivated. She has just started on meds so we will see how that goes in the run up to GCSEs. Good luck!

https://www.adhdfoundation.org.uk/resources

Thank you both for your replies. I’ll start a thread.