AIBU - DD not paying her way

[Kiki105]

I'm a single mum with an 18 & 21 YO both working FT. Youngest is not pulling her weight and keeps telling me she can't afford to pay me keep this month. My eldest pays me on time every month. I'm struggling to stay afloat and rely on their contributions each month. I've currently got the house on the market (following divorce) and struggling to see how I'll be able to afford a house that will have three good size bedrooms for us all. I'm thinking my DD is going to have to downsize to the box room as she is not paying her way. She takes all the time but never gives, I'm fed up of being a doormat. AIBU?

No keep, so she moves out. She needs to understand that's the way of the world. You pay your bills before anything else.

I agree, give her a deadline to get up to date and stay up to date. If she doesn't pay you then ask her to leave.

It's harsh but you clearly can't afford to keep her and she is taking the piss. She is choosing not to pay you.

If she was out there paying full rent and bills it would cost her far more than she is paying you. Maybe she needs to realise that for herself.

My friends all seem to have a great relationships with their daughters but my DD hates me, probably because I don't give her an easy time yet this is one step too far. I feel if I chucked her out that would be the end for us.

Yabu

She is 18.
Did your 21 year old pay their way at 18?

Downsizing with her getting the box room isn't a bad thing either. It is what it is but I wouldn't expect an 18 year old to be self sufficient. She is only learning how to budget, help her.

At some point they will move out so do you need to be looking at houses which you can afford on your own? Her having a box room is ok.

She is 18.
Did your 21 year old pay their way at 18?

21 YO went to Uni but dropped out because of Covid but yes he did once he found a job.
I know she's still young and learning but if she can afford to get her nails and eyelashes done, run a car and pay a phone contract each month then she can learn to prioritise and pay me.

What is your DD buying? So she doesn't save ANY of her wage?

Sit both girls down and show them your bills and what things cost, then Google the local rents in your area and tell your youngest that's what she may have to pay if she doesn't set up a standing order to you!

It is what it is but I wouldn't expect an 18 year old to be self sufficient. She is only learning how to budget, help her.

That's just a cop-out. I started work just after I turned 16 - and I have always been a spender rather than a saver - and I managed to pay my keep right from the start. She is taking advantage of you OP.