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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

teenage daughter extremely hairy...what can i do????

27 replies

mklanch · 26/11/2022 18:33

hi, my 14 year old daughter has become really self conscious of her hairiness.
she has thick black hair pretty much everywhere.
we have been doing her upper lip and eyebrows since she turned 12 and she has been shaving her legs and arms since then.
she has a hairy back, hair stomach, hair arms and alot of hair in her pubic area and on her bum etc. shes really embarrassed but i don't really know what to suggest or do.
I'm not a hairy person so have no idea what she can do and i hate to see her so stressed out. does anyone have any suggestions? thank you

OP posts:
FluffyYucca · 26/11/2022 18:34

Take her to the GP. Could be PCOS or something else medical that needs to be ruled out.

DuplicateUserName · 26/11/2022 18:35

What has the Doctor said?

Ihatethenewlook · 26/11/2022 18:38

DuplicateUserName · 26/11/2022 18:35

What has the Doctor said?

Where does it say she’s seen a doctor?

HuggyWuggy · 26/11/2022 18:39

Get her waxed and then laser hair removal when she turns 18.

WeeOrcadian · 26/11/2022 18:41

HuggyWuggy · 26/11/2022 18:39

Get her waxed and then laser hair removal when she turns 18.

Maybe pose the option.... Instead of just 'getting her waxed'

And see a GP. I have PCOS from being a very young teenager, hindsight is wonderful.

wildpeaches · 26/11/2022 18:43

Take her to see the GP and get tested for PCOS.

This is a very descriptive post about a child OP. I'd be wary about writing this kind of thing about your teenage daughter on the internet in future.

Greyphoto · 26/11/2022 18:47

Might be worth a GP check up as other have said.

Look into IPL machines at home. I have one and use it on my face / arms / legs / bikini and it’s definitely making a difference

Original poster
mklanch · 26/11/2022 18:49

wildpeaches · 26/11/2022 18:43

Take her to see the GP and get tested for PCOS.

This is a very descriptive post about a child OP. I'd be wary about writing this kind of thing about your teenage daughter on the internet in future.

sorry i dont post often in forums. i didnt think it would be outing. maybe i should have worded it better. can i edit it?

OP posts:
Snoopystick · 26/11/2022 18:49

agree with getting an IPL for her once checked out with GP

DuchessDandelion · 26/11/2022 18:49

See a gp to check for underlying hormone conditions like PCOS.

If she's given a clean bill of health then at other hair removal techniques if she wishes. Threading would be effective for face and she might be a good candidate for ipl or laser treatment.
In the meantime, waxing will last longer than shaving for her limbs.

Also reassure her she's not alone - lots of women have excessive body hair.

Original poster
mklanch · 26/11/2022 18:50

i will book her an appointment with the doctor. i didnt realise that it could be pcos.

OP posts:
Original poster
mklanch · 26/11/2022 18:51

DuchessDandelion · 26/11/2022 18:49

See a gp to check for underlying hormone conditions like PCOS.

If she's given a clean bill of health then at other hair removal techniques if she wishes. Threading would be effective for face and she might be a good candidate for ipl or laser treatment.
In the meantime, waxing will last longer than shaving for her limbs.

Also reassure her she's not alone - lots of women have excessive body hair.

i have been reassuring her that hair is normal, but she comparing herself with her friends and feels like shes abnormal.

OP posts:
HuggyWuggy · 26/11/2022 18:54

@WeeOrcadian , the OP asked for suggestions and my answer was simply that. It wasn't a command FGS!

From my own experience, I was quite a hairy teenager, so I feel your pain. My mum wasn't hairy but my dad was, I guess that's where I got it from! Following a visit to the GP and some tests later, they said I was borderline PCOS but weren't bothered about it too much because I had a relatively low BMI. Regarding the hairiness, they told me to go for laser hair removal. I was a young adult so I went for it and I have no body hair now.

I hope you find a solution that works for her. Good luck!

wildpeaches · 26/11/2022 18:54

It's not about being outing, it's about internet safety and weirdos getting off on this type of thing. 'Excess hair growth' is a perfectly fine description. Lots of pervs come on MN asking for suggestions or asking people to share other stories of this kind of thing to get off on.

snazzlealpaca · 26/11/2022 18:55

DD has PCOS, she was diagnosed in her early teens. However she wasn't given any medication or anything other than the diagnosis. Not sure that it will necessarily help deal with the symptom, e.g. the body hair?

I'd discuss the various options with your DD, and in particular that she doesn't have to do anything about it, but if she does want to, then she could try depilatory cream, waxing, shaving, etc.

MrsGluck · 26/11/2022 18:58

Whether or not she has pcos, she will probably want some kind of hair removal.

Maybe explain to her the different techniques and see which she wants to try.

DuchessDandelion · 26/11/2022 18:59

mklanch · 26/11/2022 18:51

i have been reassuring her that hair is normal, but she comparing herself with her friends and feels like shes abnormal.

Show quote history

I know, we all do that, especially at school.

By taking her to the gp you show you're not dismissing her concerns as well as acting in the best interests of her health. If it is pcos or similar you open up the opportunity for treatments and there will the relief in knowing what it is and being informed.

Womanofcustard · 26/11/2022 19:08

My daughter had this. Was diagnosed (fairly recently) with pcos and now getting treatment for it. However, in the meantime, she had laser hair removal and now has no untoward body hair. It’s made a huge difference to her confidence, and the type of clothes she can wear. Good luck!

Ladybrrrd · 26/11/2022 19:11

Yes to seeing the doctor. But in the meantime i would do my best to let her know she's beautiful whatever. Maybe show her some role models like Esther Calixte-Bea to show her it can be embraced.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.indy100.com/amp/woman-grow-chest-hair-esther-calixte-bea-2657780032

Kids can be cruel but it could be anything. Glasses, short hair, etc. Maybe time to start practising comebacks for comments. She already sounds like she's able to talk to you, so thats good.

Nevermindthesquirrels · 26/11/2022 19:13

You may have been told it's normal, but compared to the majority of girls, it isn't and that what she sees. I can completely understand her pain. I have PCOS and in my late teens got hairy. It was absolutely nothing on my friends of Asian heritage where it is very normal, however compared to my family who are like hairless cats, I looked like a bear.
It shattered my self esteem and I literally wanted to die. Telling her it's normal isn't going to help. Get her bloods tested and look into hair removal.

Essexgirlupnorth · 26/11/2022 19:16

I have PCOS diagnosed in early 20s but had it as a teenager. Don't have excessive hair growth but did have bad ache was prescribed dianette a pill which helps with ache and excess hair growth.

Artygirlghost · 26/11/2022 19:19

As people have already said:

  • visit your GP to work out whether there is a medial issue behind this
  • once you have eliminated medical issues, find a cosmetic solution to deal with the hair (laser removal, easy to use electric epilator).

I had that issue as a kid and my parents did nothing...it led to me being bullied and really hating my appearance.

Cr3ateAUsername · 26/11/2022 19:21

wildpeaches · 26/11/2022 18:43

Take her to see the GP and get tested for PCOS.

This is a very descriptive post about a child OP. I'd be wary about writing this kind of thing about your teenage daughter on the internet in future.

There’s always one

Original poster
mklanch · 26/11/2022 19:22

thank you all for your replies. they have really helped. we are going to book to see the gp and then look into hair removal. does anyone know how much this will cost?

OP posts:
loislovesstewie · 26/11/2022 19:24

Please take her to the doctor, I have had PCOS for all my adult life until I reached the menopause. Very hairy, awful acne and infertility. I wish I had known when I was young rather than only finding out when I was trying to conceive.

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