They grow up so fast

[MyTabbyCats]

I’m not really sure where to post this, I’m just hoping that someone might be able to relate to me.

Life feels as though it’s changed so fast and I’m mentally struggling to adapt, I think.

I have teenagers, 15 and 18. They’re lovely, well behaved and hard working. They don’t give me any reason to worry and they’re very supportive. Their dad moved out very suddenly 3 years ago. It came as a huge shock to me. We were married for 18 years (we aren’t divorced yet). Despite being shattered by this, I was determined that ultimately we’d remain friends. We’ve known one another too long to be anything but. Ex lives with his girlfriend now, and we get on fine. He lives nearby and is still very involved in our teens lives.

I started a new job just under a year ago after working in the same place for a decade.

I have a lovely new boyfriend. He lives a couple of hours drive away from me. He gets on well with my children. My children get on well with their dads girlfriend.

My parents are no longer alive. They died when my children were very young.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I often just feel as though I either want to rewind my life or fast forward it. I can’t put my finger on what is wrong with me but I want to cry most days and feel constantly tired. I feel a huge amount of responsibility in my new job and I often feel anxious about it when I’m at home. I worry about money and whether I’ll be able to give my children everything they need in the next few years.

I wonder if anyone can relate to any of this? Maybe it’s just a part of getting older (I’m 52). Thank you for reading.

Hi. Sorry that you feel like this.

Are you menopausal?

I have a few friends like this and whereas they’ve always been quite strong, determined women, they are now definitely more anxious and I also have other friends who are now angry all the time! - and they are all similar age to you. (I’m a mixture of the two!)

have you seen the FB group - the latte lounge?
www.facebook.com/groups/thelatteloungewomenover40/?ref=share

They have some good posts and you may find some information in their files that may help.

💐

Please take this as it is meant (not as a bloody woman and her hormones) but are you menopausal?

Because what you are feeling is perfectly natural, the loss of one part of your life and the desire for the next whilst you are currently in between, but the menopause intensifies those feeling for so many women. The crying, the exhaustion, the anxiety should be treatable, and when they are under control it is easier to let go of the past and build a future.

Thank you so much for those replies. I have been on the mini pill for 3 years after experiencing peri menopausal irregular bleeding and flooding. I have no idea where I currently am in the menopause because the pill stopped those irregular periods.

Then I'd make an appointment with the doctor, have bloods and think about the treatment plan, what you want to do.

Biggest thing to remember is this is all normal, I remember feeling like I was losing it. It doesn't mean that the situation you are in isn't causing issues it's just that the menopause intensify it.

My friend described it as climbing a mountain, climbing is bloody hard but the menopause means you are climbing it with a rucksack full of rocks.

That is really helpful and I hadn’t thought that it might be the menopause. I think you’re right and actually having thought about it I also have friends who I know feel a lot more anxious at this stage of life. Thank you so much for replying. I feel so much better.