Would you be concerned if...

[LovelyBitOfSquirrel69]

....your (mature) 19yo was going out with a 25yo man? I can't decide whether I should be worried or not. Haven't met him yet. Part of me thinks it shouldn't matter how old he is, as long as he treats her right?

Not really, my DD has had boyfriends with that age gap. Men generally mature later!

Yes, true. Her last boyfriend was the same age as her and very immature.

I would be concerned yes. Whilst I realise young adult males have a lot of growing up to do (I have one of those) I think that age gap at her age is too much. I have one of each so can see it from both sides.

Hmm, well I was 18 when my now husband who was 25. We've been married 20 years. But I think it's understandable to be cautious

I think it depends on the young woman, to be honest.

I was 19 when I met my now husband, and he was 26. I was more than a match for him. I was working and studying, very independent, had my own car, and a great network of friends.

I found younger men frustrating as many were inexperienced in relationships and had an unrealistic expectation of what a girlfriend should be.

I would not be worried, as long as he is decent and kind and makes her happy.

Tbh, I was 18 when I met my OH and he was 25. Looking back now it’s seems like I was a bit young, but at the time it felt fine and we are still together over 19 years later.

dd is almost 18 and I don’t know how I’d feel about her bringing home a 25 year old. But I guess it would depend n the guy. Also I was very much an adult at 18, had lived alone, had a job etc. dd is still at college and while grown up in many ways, she’s just a kid in others.

in the circumstances you describe it seems fine so long as they are an even match.

Thanks for the replies. She's very independent and confident, and can definitely hold her own.

I met my husband when I was 19. He was 28!

A little. It would depend on the teen. Dd is mature for her age (17) but naive. She's not had a boyfriend yet. So if she suddenly started seeing someone older than I'd be a bit concerned. But if she did that in 2 years after having more experience with relationships then I probably wouldn't worry.

Depends on the situation between the couple. I was a teen bride, my husband is 7 years older than me. We've been married 30 years.

I'd be a little concerned, but I don't think there's much you can do about it - they're both adults and she probably won't be happy if you try to interfere! I do know a lovely couple who met when they were 17 and 25 and have been together for 30 odd years.

At 19, no.
Under 18 same age gap, yes.