14 year old drinking to calm noises in his head

[Elfingeordiebird]

I could do with some advice.

This afternoon we had a call from our 14 year old asking to be picked up because he was drunk. We collected him and he was in a state. After cleaning him up I’ve sat with him and established that this is not the first time.

He has been complaining for a while about how busy and noisy his head is. This has stopped him getting to sleep as he can’t switch off. Tonight between tears he said that drinking is the only way to calm his brain and that he hates his head any would do anything to make the noises stop. This was hard to hear and I had no idea it was this big of a problem.

He said me he wanted to tell me about the drinking but was scared of being in trouble, I asked what he was scared of as the worst that would happen is being grounded, losing phone etc be said me stopping him seeing his friends that’s his biggest fear.

I intend to call the dr tomorrow but my question is what to do about him seeing his friends. He has some nice ones but the ones he seems to drink with are a bit more rough around the edges, I would prefer he didn’t see them of course but I don’t know if I should ground him, stop him seeing them or just for now concentrate on helping his head get sorted?

Professional medical help and should have been done as soon as started complaining about noise and voices. X

OP is going to get GP advice, and so screening and assessment will follow. As well as those that are experiencing first episode psychosis, a lot of young people hear voices for other reasons and OP needs to take practical steps as a parent in the first instance while accessing help. It wasn't my intention to minimise or diagnose, but to say that there's quite a few things that could be factors, as others have said.

Thank you for that as if I don’t feel bad enough. As I’ve said he is not hearing voices it’s noises like in a busy noisy environment where everyone is talking. I would have contacted someone immediately if he was hearing voices.

I will speak to GP first thing. We could go private but at this stage I don’t know which professional to contact. My GP is usually very good. I will push.

I am the same o/p.

as a young child my coping mechanism was reading. I read constantly. If no book, the back of the cereal packet or the shampoo bottle.

it gave my mind something to focus on and calm the busy.

i don’t drink at all because that one drink helps so much. Fortunately I don’t like the physical effects so that helps me avoid it completely. I know if I started with that one drink a night I’d not stop.

now I’m constantly on my phone, redirecting my brain. I also need to control my environment, a messy house adds to the noise, if everything is tidy and organised the thoughts calm down.

i agree with pp, get him some help and coping techniques.

Good luck, op, wishing you both the best. It's great he can trust you with all of this, you sound like a lovely mum.

I find that blasting some loud music and singing along helps. It’s like it clears my head out for a while.

Gosh that sounds very similar. I need to help him with coping mechanisms but I have no idea where to start. Thank you for your response

Poor kid. I would suggest ADHD, possibly autism and auditory processing disorder. I'm speaking from my own experiences of my son with his "buzzy head" who has all three. Regardless, he needs to be seen quickly. I wish you luck

@Elfingeordiebird
The issue is that first episode psychosis often starts like this. If caught before it spirals into full blown “voice hearing” then it might not reoccur in the future. As PP said, early intervention is so important. If it isn’t then no harm done-the EIP team will refer him to somewhere more appropriate.

He often has his one air pod in whilst doing things as he says it helps him but at night the music annoys him. He is very easily irritated by the smallest of things which I think is because there are so many things going on in his head he doesn’t want me adding to it.

Thank you. The kind comments are much appreciated.

He might find a white noise helps (not instead of getting medical attention- obviously do that too!).

I completely empathise with what he says about music helping, but only up to a certain point in the day. I am the same - I need music/radio on in the day, but after a certain time at night it becomes like bails down a blackboard- almost physically uncomfortable.

White noise/ocean sounds/rainforest, whatever he prefers, might be helpful. It definitely helps me when my head is too busy to sleep.

When I was looking for advice, psychiatry dot com was recommended to me, and they were excellent.

I had this as a teen. I struggled with it for years until I eventually saw a psychiatrist in my late twenties who put it down to stress.
I also used alcohol to numb the inside of my head and it has left me with a lifelong weakness for alcohol.

Please get him some help.

Could he listens to sleep music or audio books to help him sleep. Sometimes when I'm feeling overwhelmed and I'm just going over and over things in my head at night I put on sleep music or rain sounds to focus on

Worked in MH for a long time. I hope you get it sorted. The GP will not mess about with (potential auditory hallucinations). Particularly potential first episode/and him being so young. My first thought was has he been smoking cannabis but I can see someone has already asked this.

You must be very worried 💐.

He needs medical help. It sounds like a form of psychosis, and drinking and drug taking is sadly a very common way teens try to ease the symptoms.

You need to speak to the GP. Do not let the GP brush you off. Your son needs a referral to a psychiatrist. If you can afford it, bypass the GP completely and get an appointment for your son privately.

This isn't a drinking problem or a friend problem. Do t let the doctor send you away with a bagful of leaflets on drinking.

Yes muffled noises/indistinguishable noise is often the first sign of psychosis. You said by the end of the week he is exhausted by it ….. I think that’s more than a fuzzy head to be honest. Do not in any circs be fobbed off. 💐

I just wanted to write to say don’t panic. Even if it is psychosis then it’s not as terrifying as it seems.

I too had a stress induced acute psychotic episode. I received quick help and now everything is back to normal with no relapse. Over 5 years now which is good. Not out the woods yet but relapse rates are extremely high in the first year so it is promising.

Acceptance is important. That was my first step in real recovery. Not medicated masking. He’s going to have to be quite grown up about recognising his triggers/ escalating influences and completely remove them. I couldn’t watch tv, read the news or social media, or basically anything external for around 6 months. For him it’s likely something else - everyone is unique.

Luckily I was also an adult so could take time out of life to rest and reset. You might want to consider time off school. You would for a flu or a broken spine - brain is no different. Maybe frame this as a long holiday so it’s not alarming to him. The panic of being diagnosed will likely make things worse before better but it’s just a wave that needs to be ridden.

I would also say once you have a psychiatrist who deals with diagnoses and medication. It’s really important to push for a psychologist. That’s what helped me process the stress and trauma that triggered the episode, and also delivered the cbt which helped me with the sleep issues I had developed. I am not sure if I would have recovered without the psychologist. Psychiatrists just want to medicate the issue and don’t really have the time or inclination to delve into the nitty gritty.

You might also want to start researching about antipsychotics. Whilst essential to get over the initial crisis the NHS will want to keep you on them for a year minimum. It massively reduces relapse rates in the first year, which is the main indicator of likelihood of recurrent episodes. But there is also paradoxically an issue that for first time psychosis dose stopping or drastic dose reduction increases relapse rates up to the 3 yr mark but afterwards is associated with better long term outcomes. This is new data so not much out there but a friend who works in the field thankfully could guide me through it and am pleased to say it worked out for the best for me and am so grateful I had that information.

Good luck

@Reallyreallyborednow good grief, are you actually me? Exactly the same, yes, and exactly the same as my poor sister. It's not voices, it's not psychosis, it's just... so BUSY inside the head that something, anything has to be done to distract.
No diagnosis, but a lot of my family are neuro diverse, so a possible connection. Either way, good to see that a GP visit is on the cards for the OPs son.

Glad you’re getting medical help - yes, he’s at the starter age for schizophrenia but it could be a number of other things. And schizophrenia or psychosis - if that - can be managed well with medication. Difficult for you both but wonderful he could tell you

I wouldn't bother with grounding etc at this point. Focus on his mental health - punishing him won't help.

You clearly have a great relationship. Although heartbreaking to hear, what a relief he felt he could come to you with this. That's a credit to your parenting.

What's his relationship like with school? You will probably need to talk to them about this. Perhaps a reduced timetable if he's struggling whilst he sorts his mental health. Xx

He was brave to come to you for help.
I agree with reassuring him that he'll be OK and you'll figure out what's going on together.

It really could be any number of things. All treatable.

I agree with what people have said about possible ADHD or psychosis. OP, have a serious sit down talk with him and make him promise never to smoke weed or have anything to do with cannabis, even edibles. It's so common and people don't realise the dangers. Almost all of the people I've ever met with any psychosis or like condition got it after they smoked weed or did other psychotropic substances like mushrooms or acid. Weed is fine for most people but some people, it can make very ill. He's now definitely at risk of more problems, and needs to understand that.

For ADHD, it might be a good idea to post a question on a forum like Reddit. People who struggle with similar issues could have some good solutions. I have heard of white noise or brown noise being recommend.