DS worries

[EndlessFields]

Me and my son are getting ever increasingly concerned about puberty and the fact that nothing has seemingly happened yet despite being 14. He’s very anxious and insecure to the point where he won’t eat or drink at school to avoid using the toilets. I’m a single mum so I’m not 100% sure what constitutes a ‘normal’ time for puberty although I do know it is different for everyone. He does have IBS and Aspergers (very mild) so I’m not sure if that can have an affect at all? (I doubt it?). I worry that this will affect his already low self esteem. If anyone has any advice please so let me know, thanks.

If you are concerned had you thought about speaking with your G.P to put your concerns across. My DS is 15 and would say it has become obvious in the last 18 months that he is going through puberty. Spots, voice change etc. He certainly has never mentioned about penis size though / pubic hair. He goes to an all boys school and there are unwritten rules about keeping your distance in the toilets and not standing next to each other or even looking. What is your DS worried about when going to the toilet ?

Thanks for your comment. I have thought about the GP yeah, although there is a part of me that worries he’ll get more anxious about it thinking there’s something wrong. Also I was going to wait a bit longer before consulting a GP. He told me he doesn’t like the lack if privacy in toilets outside of home, he hates urinals because people can see him. I’ve asked about cubicles and he said they’re either blocked or other boys jump over them for a laugh.

My son was same when turning 14 but then happened all of a sudden. GP should be able to reassure.

Try not to worry OP am sure there is nothing wrong at all as they all develop at different times.
i spoke to my DS and he was adamant they just don’t look at each other and keep a good distance so not to look by accident.

Yeah I’m sure they don’t haha but it’s hard to communicate it to him. I think it’s almost two separate fears. One is fear of being seen in the nude and the other is using the toilet when others are around