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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Eating And sleeping at the wrong times

45 replies

Animallover2325 · 31/07/2022 00:00

How do you manage your teenagers eating/ sleeping habits? Ds is 16 and during the holidays he’s sleeping til practically dinner time, doesn’t want breakfast, doesn’t want lunch.. eating at night then making himself food during the night - or pasta!! I try talking about his health and I get shut down. How can I persuade him to eat ?

OP posts:
Teenagekicksmyass · 04/08/2022 06:00

My 16 year old DD is the same. I leave her to get on with it. I’d hate it if I had someone nagging me to get up just because they didn’t agree with my sleeping pattern.

She has a part time job and does lots of dance lessons. If it was affecting her getting to work or dance on time then we would have a discussion but so far it hasn’t….

Goodskin46 · 04/08/2022 06:15

Featuredcreature · 04/08/2022 05:19

I think it's fucking irritating that going to bed early and getting up at the break of dawn is seen as good and virtuous. Why? Its ridiculous. Like teenagers I have always tended towards nocturnal, sometimes it cycles like now, awake at 5am.

restonic.com/blog/morning-people-more-productive-5837#:~:text=They%20discovered%20that%20morning%20people,depression%20and%20increase%20energy%20levels.

There is fairly good evidence it's better for you.

Goodskin46 · 04/08/2022 06:30

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8882407/

toooldtocarewhoknows · 04/08/2022 06:52

Normal in this house too.

I portion supper and serve theirs in a repeatable container, left on the side to go cold and pop it in the fridge with reheating instruction.

It will be eaten around 1am.

But I know the 1am intake of calories is 'good' food.

Blendiful · 04/08/2022 08:06

I do think it is normal for teens however I am trying to discourage it too much with DD.

For starters she wakes us up getting up and banging about and we do have to be up early for work.

I am going to start switching the Wi-Fi off at about midnight.

I don't mind her sleeping a bit later and lying in a bit, but not until mid afternoon, and not when she is waking us so we are functioning on less sleep than we need!

stillherenow · 04/08/2022 08:15

I get mine up at 730 a few days a week, to walk the dog with me . She's always a bit happier when we do that. This is the first summer I've experienced of real teenage moods and dear god it's draining . All her friends are away so it's my fault for booking our holiday for the end of summer when all her friends will be doing things together without her . And it's so borrrrrring

Perfect28 · 04/08/2022 08:15

I agree with pp that teens sleeping till lunch is ok, dinner is a bit extreme. As for those who put their babies to bed at midnight because they are 'night owls', just no.

stillherenow · 04/08/2022 08:23

Having read this thread I think I'm going to suggest to dd that she can set her own times a bit as long as she comes for a walk with the dog a couple of mornings a week (has to be early as it's so hot ). I'm early up and early to bed and maybe it's not working for her . I go up 930 so it is very early but will suggest she can stay up as long as she wants but her phone comes with me (she's 14). At present we both go up and read for a bit but she's saying she can't sleep til midnight. Maybe that extra bit of independence will revolutionise her and she'll be less moody?!

OnceAgainWithFeeling · 04/08/2022 08:26

Perfect28 · 04/08/2022 08:15

I agree with pp that teens sleeping till lunch is ok, dinner is a bit extreme. As for those who put their babies to bed at midnight because they are 'night owls', just no.

You do you.

It worked for us.

WhatHaveIFound · 04/08/2022 08:57

I let my 17yo DS set his own schedule for breakfast & lunch but we always have dinner together. That way I can make sure he's eating one good meal a day.

Compared to me at the same age I don't think his diet & lifestyle is so bad!

HelenHywater · 04/08/2022 09:03

My teenagers are getting later and later each day - I met my dd coming in at 7.30 the other morning as I was making coffee!

I think it's fairly normal. But I can't stand all the cooking (and mess) at different times, so I have put restrictions on what times they're allowed to eat! (I am working in the next room to the kitchen, and I have 3 dds that cook ridiculously elaborate lunches). That means I generally see them and get to sit down with them at lunchtime - as the lunchtime slot is 1-2! We aren't eating together much in the evening at the moment as they are all working and have different shifts.

HelenHywater · 04/08/2022 09:05

My 14yo ds is away with grandparents at the moment, but I would also restrict his lunch to 1-2 and then cook dinner for him so he sits down with me. He doesn't cook elaborate lunches and subsists on cereal and sandwiches with a few haribo thrown in for good measure.

bowchicawowwow · 04/08/2022 09:06

My eldest DC was like this (still is, but lives on his own now) and I found it really irritating when he would still be in bed at lunchtime and the whole house having to adjust around it. In the holidays I would want to have friends round but it just felt awkward if he would be wandering about in his dressing gown at 1pm, eating cereal and having showers.

howdoesatoastermaketoast · 04/08/2022 09:10

think of it as a holiday to planet teenager and he'll have to plan to 'fly back' enough time before school restarts to adjust to the jet lag.

This is waay more common than you think.

OnceAgainWithFeeling · 04/08/2022 10:04

Goodskin46 · 04/08/2022 06:15

Show quote history

Define better. (A blog without sources? Really??!)

Creative people are overwhelmingly owls. Writers, musicians, actors. Life is richer with owls.

We need people able to work through the night.

MissyB1 · 04/08/2022 12:30

I have a teen boy. He's allowed to lie in, but the very latest would be midday. They need to see some daylight, its good for their physical and mental health. Also one meal a day isnt good for them, how are they going to get all their nutrition in one meal? The other thing to consider is physical exercise, if they are asleep all day and only awake at night are they actually exercising?

I have managed to get ds up today at 11 and dragged him off tto the gym - which he thoroughly enjoyed once he got there!

Chewbecca · 04/08/2022 18:38

Why would they only be eating one meal a day? DS eats one meal a day WITH US - at around 7pm. But he handles his own breakfast, lunch and snacks, as he would regardless of sleep times.

Heronatemygoldfish · 10/08/2022 09:51

My DS 14 is pretty much nocturnal at the moment and thankfully self-feeding. He's definitely a clone of me as DH is a 6am lark and DS is currently driving him potty by sometimes going to bed as DH is getting up!!
What I do object to is finding unwashed bowls everywhere or rice crispies all over the floor at 7am when I have to go to work! (And I still loathe having to get up that early just because society expects me to.)

I'd hazard that morning people are 'more productive' because work hours match theirs. If standard work hours were 11am to 7pm I'd not spend the early morning trying to get my concentration together and not MNetting Grin

Felicity42 · 10/08/2022 10:10

My two are exactly the same as this in the holidays.
If there's something they need to be at they get up. I think it's part of the separation process from parents. They like to have their own space so night time when everyone is asleep feels like freedom from a controlling mom 😗

MissMaple82 · 10/08/2022 10:11

Why fight it, leave them to it. Teenagers waking and sleeping times are very very different to adults, this is biologically proven.

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