Am I being over protective?

[Laura5616]

My daughter just turned 14 and wants to walk a mile on her own to her friends house tomorrow.
My mind is in overdrive on what could happen on the way there (not worried at all about her being at friends house)
Am I being over protective? I dont want to put my anxiety onto her but at the same time she needs to be aware of the dangers

Any advice is appreciated

She's 14 not 4!
How does she get to school?

Where is the mile? What are these dangers?

Wow. Unless it’s down a motorway you are being very overprotective.

What time is she going? What are the roads like? Hasn’t she ever walked anywhere alone before? A mile is really not far…

I suppose it depends where you live. If you live in a urban area where gangs are common and crime is high then you're bound to be nervous. If you live in an average town or village then it's time to let her have some freedom. A mile isn't far. Tell her you expect a phone call within 30 minutes of leaving home to confirm her safe arrival to put your mind at rest.

Sounds good to me, my kids would have a lift everywhere if they could. I'm always encouraging them to be more independent and walk or bus where possible.

Am I being over protective?

Yes. Walking a mile to school/a friend's house/the shops is a perfectly age appropriate thing for her to be doing. Most children start doing this when they start secondary school, so if anything she's a couple of years behind her contemporaries if she's never walked anywhere independently before.

At her age she might also be getting a bus or train with friends to another town for shops/cinema/swimming/other activity.

Has she never gone anywhere on her own before?
She could walk a mile in 15 minutes.

Unless it's through a particularly dangerous area yes you are. A mile is nothing.

Assuming she hasn't got to cross a shark infested river, climb over a power station or avoid a string of zombies, highwaymen and alien attacks, it will most likely be OK.

Are you afraid of something particular, OP?

The fact that you are asking suggests it’s not through the Arndale centre, or along the promenade in Brighton, so I think more information is needed.

Yes you are.

What dangers?

You know she’ll have left home and (hopefully) travelling and stuff in 4 years don’t you?

My daughter is 12 ( secondary school) we live in London and she travels to school with her friends on the underground and returns home on the underground with her friends.There are usually about 6 or 7 of them who travel together in her travel group.
Its a direct train and when she gets off she has a 2 minute walk to our house on a very busy road ( as in shops, hair salons, cafe etc) .

I would need to know why the 1 mile walk concerns you enough to post on MN before I could give my opinion.
Is it through a park or a secluded area ?

I'm amazed your 14 year old has never walked a mile on her own.

My 10 year old walks nearly that far to school on his own.

Goodness me… Yes you are being hugely overprotective unless there’s a relevant piece of missing information.

Unless it’s down a busy road with no foot path, then yes you are being over protective.

my dd 14 regularly walks much further than that.

My DC have been walking a mile to school, shops and friends' houses ... since they were 9.

Let me flip this round ...if you think 14 is too young, when will she be old enough?