DS2 (19) no motivation to get a job in uni holidays

[Munichfam5]

My DS is on his uni holidays and he has got no get up and go to look for a summer job,,,

it’s frustrating because he seems to be content lolling about , sleeping and watching tv ,,,

he does see his mates and he also goes back to his uni town to see his pals who are still there over summer

But DH and I have said we will not be giving him any uni living costs money over the summer unless he starts looking for and gets a job ,, there are plenty of jobs where we live up for grabs

i’ve just been in to take him some clean clothes and he’s just woken up again from another nap !

Im not sure how to get him off his bum ?!

Any advice appreciated ,, TIA. :)

Don’t give him any money or buy him any alcohol/treats.

Hi @KangarooKenny
yeah i think that a good plan

tough love seems to be the only way forward ,?

I wouldn't give him any money . That might motivate him a bit

Also make sure he has jobs round the house to complete, so complete house clean including bathrooms each week, cooking dinner for the family a couple of times a week, mowing the lawns each week etc.
Or he can get a part time job and be paid for working…..

My son has also just finished his first year at uni. He has a job at McDonalds and wouldn't even think about just lazing around over the holidays. You need some tough love and not give him any money.

Why are you washing his clothes for him?

^^ This

He does this during term time so can do it in the holidays too

Your son is an adult. It’s time he stopped tanking the piss and started behaving like one, and you need to stop enabling his behaviour.

Stop giving him money. If he wants money, he can getup off his arse and earn it. Stop cooking his meals. Stop washing his clothes. Give him a list of weekly chores to do, and if he doesn’t do them start charging him rent.

Yeah no money and stop washing his clothes/tidying up. He should be job hunting and helping round the house to earn any money.

Even my 14 year old has a job! she’s motivated by the fact she wants to earn money. remove the money and stop doing his washing you are making life far too easy, he’s an adult.

Yeah he needs a job. It's not just about money. As someone who regularly interviews graduates, those who have never had a job have no chance.

There's no context for anything in the questions they are asked. Those who have worked at Macdonalds or Asda have no trouble explaining where they have acted on their own initiative, held positions of responsibility etc

All of the above plus he should be earning & saving some now to help towards his living costs next term. As long as you are making it easy for him, it doesn't sound like he will find any motivation

Thanks for your responses - appreciated

I agree with you, he does need to have a list of chores everyday .
He will so some stuff - mowing the lawn etc , but you are right , it’s not helping him lolling about …

Hr needs to get a job asap !