14 year old struggling with friends

[RedorangeyellowBLACK]

My 14 year old dd used to be a happy go lucky, resilient little girl and was always bright and breezy, would laugh and joke all the time.
However, since going to secondary school she has had friendship issues and it’s really knocked her confidence.
She had some friends in her classes (rarely saw them outside of school) but a few weeks ago one of the girls (who has a lot of personal issues) turned on dd and wanted to ‘beat her up’, the other girls have taken this girls side (probably self preservation as they are scared of her)and now she has been ostracised in her lessons (and on social media) by this group.

Dd also has some friends in the other side of the school year, she would see these girls outside of school and they seemed like a nice bunch but over the last few months the group has disbanded a bit, one girl fell out with another and now sees other friends and one has also moved away from the group a bit, this just left dd and two others. The 2 other girls seem to have bonded and regularly have sleep overs most weekends and never invite dd. She was supposed to see one of the girls today but this girl has decided to see the other all day and has not invited dd to join them (even though all 3 are supposed to be friends), just says she is no longer able to see dd today.
Dd is so low and it really has dented her confidence, she just sits in her room most evenings and weekends. It’s breaking my heart.
I just don’t know how to help her.
There are a few dance or theatre groups in our area but I just can’t afford them and she says she doesn’t want to join without one of her friends coming so that’s a non starter even if I did have the money.
I don’t know if this is more of an issue with girls? I have a 16 year old ds and he has never had these issues, always had the same group of friends since primary school.
Has anyone else had this issue?

@RedorangeyellowBLACK
So sorry to hear you are going through this. My dd is have no an awful time with her friendships too.
I have recently bought and read, and am encouraging my dd to read, 'you don't understand me' by Dr Tara Porter.

It's written for teen girls / young women and it's really insightful. I would reccommend you try it as the woman who wrote it is a counsellor for CAMHS in n. London and has spent 20 years working with girls of all types and persuasions. It offers really helpful information about friendships.
All the best.

Oh that sounds so tough. Is she y9? Might things have a bit of a reset for y10 as they start pursuing their GCSEs and things get a bit more mixed up? Could you tell the school she is struggling? That is bullying, the ‘beaten up’ comment, so school should be kept in the loop and might have some ideas and it could inform how they structure the classes for next year. Poor her and poor you, it is horrible seeing them suffer so much, I hope your daughter can come through it and make some nice friends.

Honestly it's nothing to worry about. All these teens are going through transitions to puberty and exams and all the rest of it. Taking time out is probably healthy and no doubt she's not alone.
It'll pass hopefully without too much drama. 💐

No solid advice but some solidarity as my dd 14 is going through the same thing at the moment. Her anxiety has ramped up so every Sunday is a nightmare with the thought of going to school and not having the comfort of a group of friends. It's heart breaking and I'm hoping that the start of year 10 will bring better things for her.