What time should a 17 year old be in by

ivfbabymomma1 · 07/05/2022 19:21

Hmm my gut is saying midnight... midnight until 18 and then they can do whatever they want lol

BigSandyBalls2015 · 07/05/2022 19:23

Mine didn’t have a curfew at 17, but I expected a text to let me know where they were and a rough idea of when they’d be home or if they’d be staying at friends.

might be different though as your DD has health issues.

FabulousKilljoys · 07/05/2022 19:28

Mine didn't have a curfew at that age. They started college at 16 and one was also working nights. As long as they sent me a text to let me know where they were that was all I expected.

titchy · 07/05/2022 19:32

No curfew at sixth form age here. Though I wouldn't pick up any later than midnight, and I did want to know whose house they were at and how they intended to get home.

Greensleeves · 07/05/2022 19:33

My 17yo works several shifts a week that don't finish until midnight, then he has to make his way home. He's also doing a full-time college course. He hasn't had a curfew for nearly a year now. I do expect him to text when he's on his way home (so I can go to sleep without worrying) and to let us know if he's staying out late or overnight with a friend at the weekend.

They're transitioning into young adulthood, they have to be allowed to manage their own time.

MissAmbrosia · 07/05/2022 19:35

We never had a specific curfew. It would depend what she was doing and as pp's said, how she would get home. Party with a lift - fine til late. Hanging around in the park I would expect much, much earlier.

breakingthebank · 07/05/2022 19:36

My 17 year old only doesnt have a curfew but she always tells me where she's going and whether she will be coming home or staying at her friend's house.

TheMooch · 07/05/2022 19:39

For us it depends on where they are and with whom. Otherwise it is 10pm on a college night and weekends negotiable.
Mine will have the pleasure of being flexible tonight as they have been away today and texted that they heading back and then off out. Texting always softens my timekeeping.

pumpkinpie01 · 07/05/2022 19:48

Mine didn't have a curfew at that time, she could be off to Uni in a year and you won't have a clue what time she is getting in

mummymayhem18 · 07/05/2022 20:14

I must admit that I had wondered similar. Like your DD my daughter starts college in September. She has only just turned 16,I think must be one of the youngest in her year group as her bf is 17 in September. At the moment she has to be in at 9 on school nights and 10 on a Friday or Saturday night. Providing homework is kept up to date. Although she should be doing more revision for her dreaded GCSES's. The times are mainly to do with the bus times that would get her home for then. I do often pick her up as well but it is a bit of a pita.
I had wondered for girls what is the typical average norm. I know boys are often given a bit more leeway. A lot of her friends she hangs out with are boys.

BackflandedCondiment · 07/05/2022 20:17

LIke others, no curfew but an understanding they will tell you where they are going and approx. what time they will be back - which can change while they are out, but with a quick text to let you know.

NrlySp · 07/05/2022 20:25

I think it’s really dependant on some factors
how safe is the local area/where she is going
how is she getting back
how streetwise/sensible is she.
my 17 year old has a curfew if 12:00-12:30am as standard for weekend. weeknights he usually has too much homework to go out.
curfew can be adjusted if it’s a great party/event that’s later.
He usually shares who he is with and how he’s getting home. I would prefer he comes home with friends and is later than he comes home earlier alone.
It’s so tricky.

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 07/05/2022 20:28

Where is she? Is she expecting lifts? I left home at 17...my ds at 24 but he knew to give me a rough time he would be back. I tell mine I deserve more respect than trying to sleep worrying about them if they aren't back at the said time.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 07/05/2022 20:53

A lot of 16/17 year olds are off on hols and festivals with friends, so how do those with curfews handle that?

Chooksnroses · 07/05/2022 20:56

I have four children. I never gave any of them a curfew. I asked them what time they would be home, and I expected them to stick to that time. They knew I'd be angry if they were late. They usually would give themselves a bit of leeway and would be home earlier than expected.

thistimelastweek · 07/05/2022 21:03

@Chooksnroses just what she said.

Original poster

lailamaria · 08/05/2022 03:06

@BigSandyBalls2015 she's due an operation in August to fix her most prominent issue and the others are lifelong so i can't imagine keeping her in at 18 for my own anxietys over her health

OP posts:

WildCoasts · 08/05/2022 03:09

I had to be home by 10pm at that age. It was a pain because everyone else had to be home much later and it was really disruptive to the group. Easy solution. I left home at 17, no more curfew.

Original poster

lailamaria · 08/05/2022 03:09

@Summerholidayorcovidagain i honestly don't know if she expects lifts or not i was quite firm in telling her that it'd be 11.30 or nothing, i honestly don't know how to navigate this since she's never been out so late in her life without me, the last time i had to think about a curfew was when she was 10 and playing out

OP posts:

WildCoasts · 08/05/2022 03:10

BigSandyBalls2015 · 07/05/2022 20:53

A lot of 16/17 year olds are off on hols and festivals with friends, so how do those with curfews handle that?

See above post. I left home.

titchy · 08/05/2022 11:27

lailamaria · 08/05/2022 03:09

@Summerholidayorcovidagain i honestly don't know if she expects lifts or not i was quite firm in telling her that it'd be 11.30 or nothing, i honestly don't know how to navigate this since she's never been out so late in her life without me, the last time i had to think about a curfew was when she was 10 and playing out

Well there's always going to be a point where they haven't done x without a parent present. Crossing the road, getting a bus, going out in the evening. That's part and parcel of being a parent - developing their independence so they can do those things safely without you.

Oblomov22 · 08/05/2022 11:28

No curfew here, but then ds1 was sensible and reliable.

Oblomov22 · 08/05/2022 11:29

What made you choose the 11.30 or nothing option?

HaroonWanderluster · 10/11/2025 00:28

Curious. If your kids ever get in trouble, what time of the evenings did they get caught. 8-10 pm 10 to 12am or past midnight.

HaroonWanderluster · 10/11/2025 00:29

lailamaria · 07/05/2022 19:17

Sorry this is going to be long and i've never posted here before

My daughter is going to college in September after being homeschooled from year 7 (she has some chronic illnesses and the school wasn't helping on top of being bullied) she turns 17 in october and we're having arguments about what time she should be in by, i said 11.30 on weekends and days i don't have work but she thinks that's unfair. All my other kids had to be in by half 10 on weekends but that was because she was a baby when they were teenagers (i got pregnant young and had her in my late 20s) she thinks because she'll be 17 she should be able to stay out later given that she texts me and comes in around half 1, i haven't given a thought to curfew on college days.

Curious. If your kids ever get in trouble, what time of the evenings did they get caught. 8-10 pm 10 to 12am or past midnight.