Two years of CAMHS, no diagnosis. ADHD?

[SicklyYellow]

From the age of 13 Dd was self harming and hated herself. Stopped going to lessons and would have stayed home and just watched tv if we didn't insist she attend. She sat in the library or in the medical room. She had very good friends and was bright too, when she could be bothered.

We managed to get her first CAMHS appointment within weeks of her telling me about how worthless her life was and she had two years with them, eventually being diagnosed with low mood and anxiety. She went on AD's at 15. Things slowly improved, then with lockdowns sunk back, missing the routines and her friends.

She scraped through her A levels and is in her first year at uni, doing a course she's been passionate about for years. Loves her new friends and the student life in a lively city. Not so much the work, which doesn't surprise me. I virtually had to sit on her to revise for GCSE's and A Levels! She has just told me she wants to change course in September. Something I've never heard her mention before.

She's also convinced she has ADHD. I don't know much about it, but from what I've read I think she's right. We managed to get a telephone appointment with the doctor and she has been referred, but warned there's a really long wait - 4 or 5 years.

Any advice or words of wisdom would be really appreciated. I could pay for a private assessment, but even then there's a huge backlog. I'm concerned she'll start the new course and find that too much too, but she's adamant and (in theory) a responsible adult.

I just want her to have a easy, normal life after 5 very difficult, turbulent years.

She should talk to her uni. They will sometimes fund a private assessment. They can also put support in place for her.

People with ADHD can be very impulsive so I would see if she's amenable to talking through the course change so she's sure it's the right decision. ADHD is an interest based disorder and so it's also extremely important that she's doing a course she is interested in. ADHD brains can't force their way through boredom. And their brains don't work well if not interested.
So being in the right course for her is doubly important.

I am 49 and was diagnosed a few years ago. I would have had a much easier time in life and achieved so much more had I been diagnosed and treated earlier. I have coped by being stressed as the anxiety acts a stimulant. Unfortunately I think running my life on stress and anxiety has led me to develop chronic illnesses which have seriously impacted my life. The prognosis generally for a person with untreated ADHD is very poor.

I would try to facilitate her getting a diagnosis as soon as possible if I were in your shoes. If uni can't help then could you afford private?

Definitely get her to talk to student services. It’s not at all unusual for people to become aware of their issues (for want of a word) in the transition to uni. Sometimes people have done quite well in secondary but fall apart without the structures of classes, and bells and homework.

they see students all the time who are struggling but haven’t been diagnosed yet and they really want to help them succeed. It’s possibly the best environment to be in at a time like this.