14 year DD has NO friends

[zazzabeans]

I have 2 daughters in years 9&10z
Younger was in sociable and has friends older one not so much.
She had friends but as they get older said friends want to be going out socialising /boys etc, my DD Is happy at home with a book!
She still has these people to stand with at school but that’s where it ends.
She relies heavily on my younger daughter at times which even though they clash at times.
I keep reminding my daughter she has about 18 month left at that school and will fly over but she is so sad and depressed. I cry myself to sleep about it sometimes 😞

To be fair OP many adults don't have friends from their schooldays so this may not be a problem in the long run. What are her plans for after-school?

Can you get her involved in some out of school activities? Typical introverts prefer socialising in structured activities where they know what's expected of them and they have a separate focus.

Could you perhaps encourage her to try some out of school activities? Drama club, horse riding, canoeing etc all very sociable and not competitive

Cross posted with @PeacefulPrune

Crying yourself to sleep about it / reacting so strongly is going to make her feel worse not better.

Lots of people don’t maintain friends from school. She needs to find her tribe. If she’s going to university it will be easier there.

In the meantime talk to her about how she feels about it (not how you feel about it). What interests does she have she’s like to develop? If she joins things she’s interested in she’s more likely to stick at it while she makes friends.

Dd was the same at school.

She actually had online friends who she met via a minecraft server and they could talk in real time via discord or something so that helped.

She moved school at sixth form and was popular at her new school. Made friends who she’s still in touch with.

She hasn’t really made many friends at uni but has a boyfriend and friends from her part time job so she’s happy enough.

Agree with the post about structured activities. Anytype of cadets is good for this. A popular nationwide chain of bookstores also hold young adult bookclub events as well that you can look up online so she can maybe find her tribe there.

So I think just reassure your Dd (if she’s bothered about it) that it’s not her.

It sounds like you are far more bothered than Dd.. she will find her own way.

Like many said most friends from school dont last. I mostly hated most the people in my year.

You're saying she doesn't have a lot of time left in this school. It seems she has grown apart from these friends but hopefully will make new friends in the new school with similar interests!

Try asking her if there are other kids that she knows in school that she can talk about the things she likes (books. Is there something else?)