Please help!!!!! How can I limit app use/screen time?

[Whatisthepointinthis]

Dcs 15 and 9 are incapable of self-regulate their screen use.

Dc 9 on YouTube and Fortnite and dc15 on Snapchat, Instagram and tik tok.

It is massively impacting the household dynamic and causing tension and rows.

Dc15 has gcses this year and will not do homework or revision, preferring to spend hours on their phone completely zombie like.

Dc 9 will not come off game without a huge battle despite agreeing times before going on.

Cannot turn off WiFi as dh and other dc use it for work.

Tried apple screen time setting for phone but dc 15 seems to have overridden it.

Tried resetting Snapchat & Instagram passcodes to ones I chose but this hasn’t worked either.

Am at wits end……

Trying to be a responsible parent but feel kids are one step ahead.

Have tried bargaining, reasoning etc. with no joy. Now need to assert authority. Both dc turn into horrible kids when they are on these and are totally addicted. I’m not against them per se but in moderation and not to the detriment of school work.

Please advise on how I can do this., especially practical advice before I lose the will to live.

Get Qustodio . It will solve all these issues
App store

Sometimes the bigger the issue is made, the bigger the issue becomes...

We use FamilySafety and FamilyLink to set daily time limits and daily "off" time for each child.

My kids are 11 and 7. They both get 1hr 30mins on weekdays and 3hrs on weekend days, and gadgets are disabled between 8pm and 8.30am (which means no gadgets before school). These are pretty hard limits and rarely extended they think I am an evil mother.

I agree that too much screen time makes them moody and causes problems, I used an app called ourpact before, you can set times that they can use certain apps, after that time they go off, you can also allow certain apps at all times, and you can ban some apps completely if you want. You have to pay for it, I can't remember how much but it is worth it

Also see if your wi-if router has an app. Ours has the ability to turn off specific devices. A threat I have yet to carry out with DC (15) to encourage him to do revision!

Yy, change the router settings. When they run of data, they run out of data, so will end limiting themselves.

Hi I have a 9 year old who loves the screens. O know it's hard but at that age is it not about just being totally clear on boundaries. So if he kicks off when you turn it off he doesn't get it the next day ? It must be hard with the big age gap as the older one gets more time ?

I honesty think my 9 yesr old can't handle more than 45 mins to an hour of gaming or YouTube. He is okay if it's TV or a film but the gaming makes him grotty.

I would also not expect a 9 year old to self regulate at all. I mean...let's ge realistic most of us adults fail constantly to self regulate our phone use in a healthy way.

We used the Screentime app, worth paying for, for us, though I think there are probably more options now.

I liked them earning more time by doing tasks (like completing homework) and being able to pause everything at mealtimes.

You shouldn't need to use an app to stop your kids using an app! Where does it end.

Why do they get to use all this technology if they can't be sensible and respectful? So they act up when they use it and then nothing happens and they get to have another go? They're learning nothing.

Assert yourself. You're the adult.

No screen unless all homework and chores are done.
Anyone is cheeky it's put away.
Anyone plays up when time is over its put away.
Anything but being grateful it gets put away.
Don't let them act up. Don't let your children do things that annoy you. Basic parenting.

Good luck.

"Anything but being grateful"
Grim.

The big issue here is that both DC have unconditional and unlimited screen time. They should be earning it through homework, revision, chores and general behaviour.

My DC all have to do an age-appropriate amount of study before they get any screen time. I’d expect your 15 year old to be doing 3 hours of work a night and the 9 year old 30 minutes study and 30 minutes reading.

I also don’t think that 9 year olds should have a lot of screen time at all tbh. I’d be looking to really limit him to perhaps an hour on weekdays and 2 hours at weekends, to include all gaming and TV time.