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Teenagers

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Difficult DD after visiting Father

3 replies

Edith1 · 18/10/2021 11:21

I have 2 teenagers a DD & DS. Me & their father separated when they were 10. They have had regular contact with him and stay with him once a week. My DD, who is 16, has been, on and off, for the last year playing me & her father against each other. If I say no, which isn't often - she goes to her dad - who of course is more lenient & lacks a sense of responsibility (one of the reasons we separated). To make matters worse on her return from her dads her attitude towards me has now become sullen, unresponsive, and what I would term ignorant and rude. I've tried speaking to her, but she just shruggs her shoulders and the worse thing of all smirks. I am quite a liberal parent and open to discussion and negotiation, but DD just shuts down. She is a bright academically and very attractive, with a strong friendship group and has recently got a boyfriend who she has known for sometime, as they went to school together. I have spoken to her Father and things improved for a short while, which makes me wonder what is being said when she visits him, but it all feels very unstable. I want to have a good relationship with my DD, but the dynamic between her, me & her father i feel is harming all my hard work as a mother over the years and I feel I have to walk on egg shells around her. Anyone else had a similar experience?

OP posts:
GoingOutOutNEVER · 18/10/2021 18:26

Could it be she’s 16 and is rebelling against you and she knows she can because you’re safe, Rather than it being something to do with her dad?

BlackeyedSusan · 19/10/2021 22:39

pretend to mistake the smirk for a smile. they are the fucking worst

hang on in there, It will get better.

Edith1 · 25/10/2021 16:23

Thanks both!

OP posts:
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