14 year old turning into wannabe gangster

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Daily Mail or any other tabloid I give no permission for this to be used or copied.
I’m hoping it’s a phase but my 14 year old has changed completely and is becoming rude and how much he has changed.
He is into rap music and talks like a gangster in films and thinks it’s funny to joke about spliffs and his crew. (He doesn’t smoke but he jokes about people at school doing it)
He thinks it makes him fit in at school and it worries me his attitude and starting not to listen to a word I say.
Any advice?
Do you come down hard on the rudeness and the silly gangster talk or will that make it worse?

Saying you don’t give permission won’t stop them.
Either decide to punish anything inappropriate with sanctions.
Or outgangster him!

Yes it's probably a phase. If he's rude to you tell him off, the talking like people in films is annoying but probably not the end of the world.

Talk to him about drugs etc, and not a "DO NOT DO DRUGS" lecture, talk to him.

The music is not the culprit, his environment (probably at school/in his friend groups) is what has brought it on.

Also, "Daily Mail or any other tabloid I give no permission for this to be used or copied" holds no weight whatsoever, as an aside.

@Wolfiefan

Saying you don’t give permission won’t stop them. Either decide to punish anything inappropriate with sanctions. Or outgangster him!

Hahaha yes! Copy his language, that'll stop him pretty smartish 😂 Nothing stops something being cool like your mum doing it when you're 14!

Mine does this a lot. I particularly enjoy calling him L'il (name) and asking him how his crew are
I'm sure it's just a phase and he'll look back on it and laugh, like I do when I look back on my gladioli wielding, doc marten wearing, angst ridden Smiths phase in the late 1980's.

Educate him about drugs by using real life situations that have been reported in the press innit brap brap brap

Hahaha yes, another vote for out gangster him. I do this to my little road man and he finds it mortifying! Gotta make dem peas bruv

I think it's an easy fix op. Get yourself some really baggy joggers, sock and sliders, snap back on and go meet him from school. Playing some really old school rap.
I'm certain that'll sort it

Sounds like the so called ‘Road Men’ at our school.
Do they all wear black North Face jackets?

@peaches99

Sounds like the so called ‘Road Men’ at our school. Do they all wear black North Face jackets?

Funny enough he thinks he is cooler than a 'road man' but he now wants a Compton hat and shades

Oh, I have not heard of that particular species!
Good luck, I am sure he will grow out of it eventually 😎

I would laugh at all the gangsta talk and copy him so he starts to find it cringe. Rudeness is a different matter though. That needs consequences.

Another vote for use all his street-slang (look some up if you want more pointers) use it wrong. Use it in front of his friends. Make up your own words for stuff and tell him he's wack if he hasn't heard those words before. This is a terrific opportunity, don't waste it famalamalam .... :-)

I cringe when I recall my 14 year old self explaining to my parents in great detail the meaning behind Tupac and Eminem lyrics :) they never scoffed or judged, just listened to my absolute nonsense and asked polite interested questions.

I think that's what you have to do - he's trying to learn who he is, and that involves experimentation I guess. Just be interested, ask questions, and then once he knows you're on his side - definitely begin to out gangster him!

By the time I was 16 I was over it ,(after a brief period of thinking I might be a witch :) )

I went on to have a successful career and to be well spoken etc - but 90s hip hop will still be my guilty pleasure.

Talk to him about codes of behaviour and language and tell him he can save it for his mates.

Also talk to him about drugs and making good decisions.

Also tell him you’ll pick him up from anywhere, any time of day or night if he needs you.