Seeking some constructive advice please. I have 2 DC with exH. 18 & 16. Have been divorced coming up 3 years.
Ex and I have no relationship to speak of as he has never forgiven me for ending our dysfunctional marriage. At the time of the split I wanted main residency but DC's were encouraged by him to go 50/50. This never worked mainly due to his refusal to engage in any communication. I ended up with younger DC 90% and elder was with him about 80%. He gave her free reign - was allowed out without curfew, left alone at home when he was away, allowed to drink unchecked... anyhow it all eventually went wrong and he threw her out. They are now estranged (exH's choice) and I have her 100%.
However the younger (16 yo) is now going down same path - was out in town at gone 1am last night, flunked GCSE's, drinking.... I've found him a college which will accept him but again his father won't agree behaviour standards and I fear he'll either not attend or not focus on college (he needs to resit).
I've asked that he's not allowed out late etc but these pleas are ignored. What can I do? Clearly living with dad is a more fun option in view of lack of boundaries but my son is much more likely to take the wrong path than my daughter. Would social services become involved if I raised concern with them? I'm literally at wits end with tracking his phone all hours just to find out where he is