How do I get DS to have a haircut?

[Haircutneeds]

He’s almost 17 so it’s completely out of my control but honestly it’s awful. I think he thinks it looks different to how it actually does. I’ve tried taking photos to shown him but he thinks it’s just a bad photo. It’s literally like a cross between a bush and Sideshow Bob from the Simpsons. It’s really letting him down and I fear putting off the girl he fancies at the moment. I’ve suggested we go to a really cool barber in town but he insists he doesn’t need a haircut. Help!

Why does he need it? Is he still at school and is it part of the uniform policy? If so wait till they tell him.

If he's working, or at college then leave him be. He'll get it cut when he's ready. He's growing up and learning to be autonomous in his choices. They won't always be the same as your choices. You might think it looks bad....but if he's happy....then sorry but his decision.

In my experience there are two types of 17-year-old boys - those who are primped and preened to an exacting standard, every hair gelled into place, every label has to be exactly right, and ones who look like they’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards and got dressed in the dark. I teach this age group and my subject attracts mostly those from the second group. I laugh to see the sport students walking past like models while my class probably don’t remember to brush their hair every day! It doesn’t seem to hurt their friendships or relationships as the people they hang out with will be from the same group. They usually smarten up around the end of sixth form and look like different people if you happen to see them again after they’ve left.

Just leave him alone. He's almost an adult.

It's his hair myob. Imagine how you'd feel if he told you that you resembled Sideshow Bob's mother and you need to get it cut!

@pinkflask he’s definitely not from the first group. There’s no way any gel would get anywhere near his head. I do think he thinks his hair is quite cool/ on trend though and I think I know what he’s trying to achieve but failing drastically. He’s after that curly on top style (and could achieve this) but instead it’s a bush.

I know I need to leave him alone but it’s hard! (I’ve not told him he looks like Sideshow Bob btw)

There is nothing you can do, he has to work it out for himself. Will his friends not tell him?

My son was the same at 17, I just let him get on with it. he looks lovely now.

@Hellocatshome I wish his friends would tell him as I’m sure he’d listen to them. Don’t know if they’re being polite or think it’s cool as well.
@Shehasadiamondinthesky thanks that’s encouraging at least.

Same experience here, i am trying so hard to let it go and just occasionally offering a barber visit...

So hard isn't it 🥰

1. tell him you love it, fawn over it every time you see him, stroke it, buy him hair products to emphasise the look.
2. do your hair the same.

Tell him you love it just how it is. That should do the trick.

I was going to say just leave the poor boy alone, but the idea of admiring and emulating it is a great one.
Basically with DS he ignored it when we said anything about his hair, but was off to the barbershop the day after his young adult cousin mocked it.

Bribe him. My DS (15) had an overhanging curly shelf ! It looked shocking. Bribe worked 👍