Am I overthinking?

[notcutoutforthisjob]

My DS16 has told me he has a date this weekend. Going out for food and back to a girls house. They've been chatting on social media, but haven't met. I feel uneasy about it.

Suggested they go for food and cinema instead. He said no films they want to see. They had looked at another activity, but it's adults only after 8pm.

I have no doubt that people will think I'm an awful, interfering mum. But, please believe that I have my reasons, which I can't go into here.

I know I can't stop him. And his dad has had "the chat" with him. And so have I, to a lesser extent. I haven't yet asked if her parents will be home, as although he voluntarily told me about the date, I think he was starting to feel interrogated

Am I overthinking it? I do have anxiety, so perhaps I really am. Or would others be uncomfortable with this?

Thanks.

He's 16. Is she 16. Talk about consent etc as opposed to just condoms. But also he doesn't just want a boring staying in relationship. Alton towers etc? But if she isn't 16 and they have sex he could be prosecuted remind him of that

It sounds like a normal evening for two teens. Taking your son back to her house where her parents presumably lives shows that all is above board. He'll probably leave hers by 10.30pm, depending on how far away she lives. They'll have time to chat and see how they like each other.

The only odd thing that I can think if they have only met on social media so far; I know a lot of people meet dates that way nowadays but I didn't think 16 year olds would need to, they surely know loads of people without resorting to online dating.

It'll be interesting to see what they think of each other once they have met and talked, it probably seems quite exciting for them. If her parents are OK with it, I doubt you have any reason to worry.

You or his dad could offer to pick him up, maybe. Do ask for the address, just for emergencies, and maybe her phone number in case his battery goes flat.

How old is the girl? That would be my first concern.

That's a point, Aquamarine. I was assuming she was 15 or 16. I hope she is!

Op, offer to drop him off and pick him up.

She's 16 too.

Honestly Op I'm not sure what is wrong with this scenario. The only thing that jumps out at me possibly as worrying is him planning to go to the home of someone he has never met in person - and I would also be concerned a girl is agreeing to bring him home having never met him

If an adult friend of mine was going on an internet date where they hadn't met - the advice would be clearly not to go to each others homes.

Is that what you are worried about?

Otherwise I think at 16 there really isn't much you can do about teens spending time together.

If they're both 16 I don't see the issue.

What is it that you're concerned about?

They are meeting initially in a public place so that would eliminate my initial concerns as it means DS can then leave if he's not comfortable/she's not who she claims to be etc.

Otherwise, no different to going round to any other friend's house?

(My DS also met his girlfriend on social media. So much of teen's life is virtual, I think it's not that unexpected).