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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Curfew for a 16yr old

4 replies

Barryallen · 28/07/2021 19:44

Hi all,
Quick question for anyone who has a 16yo (17 in November)
What curfew do they have in the summer? During the school year it was 10pm although she had a full workload with school so it was generally 11 on the weekends.
At the moment we have a curfew of 11 unless she’s working (then it’s 12 because they close the store at 11 and have to clean up at the end of the shift)
If it has any bearing on it, we aren’t in the UK so she is driving (on a restricted license so she can’t drive friends for 6 months) and has her own car. When she’s driving the license curfew is 12 so that plays into it also!
She has various groups of friends ranging in age from her age to 18/19 (going off to college in September)
Just interested in what other parents of 16 yr olds do!

OP posts:
ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 28/07/2021 20:08

no curfew as there's no regular going out late that would warrant it.

he tells me where he goes and when he'll be back, if cycling he prefers to be back by dinner/before it gets dark.

otherwise, if I have to drive him I have to pick him up so that depends on when party finishes, usually around midnight.

my DS2 has just turned 18, a few months ago when he went out with friends he'd either need me to pick him up as well or get an Uber home. latest he got home was 3am, again he'd tell me where he was going and when he'd be back.
if time ran away he'd just text me revised ETA.

GreenLakes · 29/07/2021 11:16

I certainly wouldn’t be imposing a curfew on someone who is nearly 17. She could go off and live by herself if she wanted, so I think it’s totally inappropriate.

blametheparents · 29/07/2021 11:47

Does it have to be a strict curfew?
How many nights is she out that it would even apply to?

I have a 16 year old and wouldn't have a strict curfew that applied to every night. She is not out every night anyway. If she wanted to go out and she was going to the cinema (for eg) then I would assume/expect her to be home after the cinema, but if she was going to a party that finished at 1am, then that would be fine. BUt we'd have a chat about it and I'd know where she was.

DD might also stay over at a friend's house, but I would expect to know whose house she was staying at.

Barryallen · 29/07/2021 15:38

Thanks for the different views - I am actually from the UK so grew up in a completely different environment from the one my teens have! I had freedom at that age but also I wasn’t driving and we could walk everywhere we needed to go. We’re in the US so everything is a lot more spread out, she’s driving at 16.5 and obviously drinking isn’t allowed until 21 (police are strict about it in our area)
If she’s driving then she absolutely has to be home by 12 otherwise she could lose her license if caught- however a favorite activity is to just drive around and get food/park and hang and I do know drinking and weed happens with a lot of the teens. Whilst we know she may experiment we are terrified of her making a poor choice whilst she is driving. Ugh - it’s so hard. We do, as some people suggested, make decisions based on each situation so it is fluid.
It’s just hard because until she got her license she relied totally on us or older friends to take her and pick her up from everywhere she went- going from that to her having her own car and just being able to up and go out whenever is maybe what I’m struggling with lol!

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