14 year old sister is getting out of control!

[zephyrcat]

My sister is about to turn 14. She is 13 years younger than me and has always been 'the good one'. Recently she's not being so good! She goes out with her friends most evenings. They get the older boys to buy them drink and they all get drunk in the parks. I'm worried sick about her. Apparently some of the 15/16 year old boys around her way are doing Coke and Heroin!!?!?! My sister is drinking anything from alcopops to vodka. She wont talk to my mum but luckily she confides in me about what she's really up to and i'm able to let mum know where she is. Are all teens like this these days????

Can't offer any real advice I'm afraid, just sending you love and sympathy. You sound like a great sister and just by being there for your sister you'll probably help her alot to get over this stupid phase. Can you get her interested in anything else - sports or hobbies? Somehow help her get a new set of friends... maybe she's trying to keep up with these others. Not much fun for you though, good luck.

Why is she out on her own in the evenings at this age? I'd stop that straightaway.
All teens arent like this although lots are. I would really urge you to speak to your mum to stop her going out on her own in the evening. There is no need.

Zephyrcat - they're such a bloody worry aren't they? FWIW she sounds much like me at that age (well maybe slightly older and without the Coke!).

I have teenage boys and a pre-teen dd. It's very difficult when they are at this age - especially if they have nowhere structured to go. I have always made my ds's friends welcome in the house, even if it mean't having half a dozen of them, camping in the kitchen, just so they didn't have the excuse of having nowhere to go. Costs a fortune in pop and pizza but worth it for the lack of stress . On the up side winter is approaching and they are much less likely to want to be outside in the cold and wet.

I would love to have my oldest one's friends over, but it's really difficult when you have younger ones as well. Most of the kids wouldn't be around until 7ish and then the youngest is supposed to be on his way to bed. I don't think my 14 year would be impressed with me shushing him and his friends and the little one shouting "....got a girlfriend, etc etc!" It's so hard because then he's at other friends houses and how do I know he's staying there and not walking round the park? Other people's mums probably don't nag as much as me about being safe and "boring" stuff! Well done on being a great big sister!

I've got 2 teens and a 6yr old. Never really had that much of a problem with any of them having friends round. They just have to learn tolerance!!!!
Just reached the stage with my dd (almost 17) where she's asking to go into town with her friends on friday nights, it's a bit worry- not so much on the drinking front as on the safty issue-towns not a friendly place at the weekends!

I have to say I wasn't a brillian teenager but we never drank or lied about where we were staying. The thing that makes me laugh about it is that I grew up on some not very nice council estates where it was more likely for this to be going on - my mum and sister now live in a very well off area and the kids are so much worse!!! My mum usually has her home by 9 i think but a lot of her friends are allowed out till much later. It amazes me that so much has changes since I was doing it 10 years ago!!

as a foster mum to teens and a mother of 3 teens of my own sadly yes this is becoming the norm all you can do is advise make sure they have all the facts then pick up the pieces

hi im pregnant with my first baby which is due on 16th march.just wondering if anyone else is due in march?i'm really nerveous because i'm the last in my family to have kids so I have alot to live up to.if anyone else knows how I feel please send me a message.

shortiemum, very nice to see you on mumsnet but I think you've got the wrong thread - this one is ante-natal club due March, you should get lots of support there.

Good luck with your baby - I think everybody is terrified first time round, I know I was. I'm sure you will be a great mum, just do it your way, don't worry about what your family say!

sorry i realized after posting