ADHD, seeking help

[creaturcomforts]

I'm really unsure as to the best way to support and help my dd age 14. Would really like the tools and information to help my daughter as much as possible.

Basically my dd has always been what I would call a busy and energetic person, she has always had alot o energy and at times I've noticed a difficulty in focusing, fidgeting it hasn't effected her in ways of socializing but throughout primary she has had times that her teachers have mentioned that she has answered back and not able to sit still.

She becomes very stressed and overwhelmed with having tasks and particularly homework, which I encourage and help her with, but she gets emotionally overwhelmed and stressed recently with any sorr of routine, it's hard to explain but I had thought of adhd from a young age but since she was able to cope and not wanting to put a label on her I havent got support for her.

Dd is smart and can apply herself when she has an interest but has been able to tell me that she struggles with school as she blanks out alot and has told me that her teachers have been telling her off and that she is struggling.

She has said herself to me that she believes she has adhd and ibe asked her to explain the problems she has at school so we can go to the gp with all the information we might need, I really want to help her and her this right as she has said she needs and wants help.

I believe her completely and would appreciate any help or advice from other parents with a teen or child with ADHD to get support for her as I think that the schools have never highlighted anything and at times put dd actions as bad behaviour, I've seen dd at a young age become really upset about this such as talking constantly when it's not appropriate.

She has recently developed a head tic and has always had a habit of repetition of certain sounds .. I've asked her if she doesnt mind to write down the difficulty she has at school with concentration to provide to a gp which she is now doing , is there any other things that people would recommend?

Have often thought that there might be something there and feel very guilty about not going to a gp, but have given extra support and tried to work with her, as am scared of labelling dd and the possibility of medication.

Since she has done well at school and is very sociable I've felt that I might be over reacting but she has explained that she at times struggles

hi OP
I have a 14 yr old ds with adhd. Not diagnosed in UK though.

has the school asked for a diagnosis ?
is she completing all her work? or is she disrupting classes, avoiding school work and failing tests etc?

ds is busy and energetic, bright and very much a teenager.
But he's also very easily distracted, only interested in his own conversation. adhd is immaturity. so he struggles with his peers. he also has no executive functioning.

We had him diagnosed at schools request. he's now on medication. it definitely helps his focus. otherwise he cannot access the curriculum.

It might be worth making an appointment with an occupational therapist who can help with organization skills, daily tasks and more. this will be my next step. Mainly because any mum asking a teenager to help around the house is hard. But asking a teenager with ADHD is next to impossible.

Thank you so much for your reply, I'm really torn if the truth be told as dd has alot of friends and is quite strong willed/bossy , she seems to know what she wants.

She can concentrate on school work if she enjoys the subject but yes she has fallen behind and i dont know what is best!

I've often wondered about ADHD as she has some really repetitive behaviour and it can be quite inappropriate at times, yet she doesnt seem to realise.

This has turned some friends off in the past...

She has developed a head tic and will repeat the same words over and over at times.

I wonder if it's a mild difficulty, and I really don't want to label her...

Please look for a diagnosis. Undiagnosed adhd, particularly in girls as they are good at masking things, can lead to awful mental health problems as expectations on them become bigger as they get older. They then can't cope and some will fall apart.

I speak from experience- dd just diagnosed inattentive add at 17 after heartache since year 9.

Good luck

Also tics are v common in people with adhd

Have you spoken to the school SENDCO?

Hi OP. My 16 year old daughter was diagnosed with ADHD 2 years ago. All throughout school, every parents evening, teachers said she was a daydreamer. It was only when she hit her teens that I felt we were missing something. She has never been hyperactive, but struggled more and more to focus, retain information, be organised, on time, the list goes on. I never suspected ADHD. Until I stumbled across an article about ADHD in girls. It was a complete lightbulb moment. She ticked every single box for the criteria for diagnosis. I took her to the GP who referred her for assessment and she was diagnosed after various assessments. It's worth looking up the criteria for a diagnosis as this will help you if you go to your GP. Good luck.