Sure this is fairly standard teenage stuff but I'm still fairly new to the teen years so could use some perspective!
DS1 and DS2 are 14 and 12, get along well enough most of the time, like most brothers know exactly how to wind each other up. Are well behaved and generally lovely, and no SN. They do have spats but nothing out of the ordinary that I've noticed and can each give as good as they get.
DS1 has always been super sensitive especially to anything that he perceives as an injustice. His injustice scales are very finely tuned especially when it comes to DS2! In his ideal world I would intervene in every minor sibling annoyance or squabble.
DS2 OTOH is much more laid back and quick to forget squabbles. (Admittedly not a teen yet so this may change!) Can be annoying and does know exactly how to push DS1's buttons.
Example: over the weekend we have some friends over and DSes are on the Switch with other kids. An argument breaks out because DS1 wants to play a game in a serious way and DS2 is just messing about with it in an annoying way.
I come in and suggest that they find a different game to play that everyone can enjoy. DS1 and DS2 again start squabbling about the first game. I say (a bit more firmly) that with guests in the house we are not going to argue over a game and to find something different to play.
DS1 stomps off for the rest of the afternoon and at bedtime is still very upset, tears etc because in his opinion I let DS2 get away with 'spoiling the game', "he always does this" etc. Why should he get away with it with no punishment.
I try to explain to him that actually it was one minor squabble after they'd been playing nicely for ages, which they usually do, and that perhaps it is better to focus on the positive times he has with his brother rather than store up a list of grudges? But find myself having to justify why I didn't bawl DS2 out in front of a room full of guests.
DS2 meanwhile has forgotten the whole thing and gone happily to bed!
So not quite sure if I handled this right or could have done something different. I have Read How To Talk etc and generally try to listen to all their woes but was I bu to expect them to sort this out without all the drama?