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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Swearing...oh the Swearing!!!!!

15 replies

GloomyWaters · 18/05/2021 00:09

DS 16 swears constantly. F this F that.
I dont like it particularly when it's eveey sentance. Tonight I told him I dont want to hear it...it is constant. All I get from him is... it's just words get over it!!!

OP posts:

DramaAlpaca · 18/05/2021 00:12

Nope. You don't have to put up with that. Tell him to swear outside the house if he must but foul language isn't acceptable in your home. And keep saying it.

DramaAlpaca · 18/05/2021 00:13

Meant to say, 16 year old boys can be very tiresome (I've had three of them) but they grow out of it eventually. I sympathise.

Original poster

GloomyWaters · 18/05/2021 23:55

Thanks. Yes he will mature and grow out of it but boy it seens every sentence plus, he thinks I shouldnt mind as it's "just words" 😡

OP posts:

Pumpkinstace · 19/05/2021 00:15

Tell him racial/homophones slurs are also just words but in the right circumstances can land you a criminal record.

You can get arrested for swearing at a police officer.

They aren't just words. He's using hostile language.

But try telling that to a 16yr old...

Snooks1971 · 19/05/2021 18:55

Sympathy to you OP.

I love using a good swear word myself, I am not against swear words but there’s a time and a place or situation and they need to learn that. I appreciate that it is very subjective though! They need to earn their swearing stripes

With mine when/if it’s been a phase of just F this or F that… I say would you say that to your teacher?
Teen: No
Me: Would you say it to Nanna?
Teen: No
Me: So don’t say it to me then. I don’t mind you knowing words but you need to know how/when to use them. And yeah some are homophobic and against the law. Swearing isn’t cool..

I don’t say it quite like that though, not like a lecture!

UrsularghWigins · 25/05/2021 09:27

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KarenOkefe · 25/05/2021 21:53

I am sure that you are an amazing parent! However what I advise is more discipline, it can be hard sometimes, it's hard for me all the time, but just tell him that you wont have it and put in consequences is my only suggestion, hope this helps!

Maray1967 · 01/06/2021 14:51

Your house, your rules. Get tough. I’ve turned off wifi when student son would not stop swearing loudly while gaming and he doesn’t routinely swear in normal conversation. Have started now with DS2 13 - he is on a warning.
Does he expect food? Phone? Lifts? Make your expectations clear and implement consequences. He does not get to say what language is acceptable in your house and he’s being a smart arse with the comments about its only words because he knows he could not talk like that to the teachers.

anothernewtop · 01/06/2021 14:57

Mine have never done this. The occasional swear has popped out but in the main they save that for when it's slightly more appropriate, with friends ?

heathweller74 · 02/06/2021 23:52

when my youths started saying words like frck and crd it really drove me round the bend. i very much sympathise and i would reccomend giving them a good discisplining (sorry for the bad spelling I've been drinking a lovely Waitrose red and I'm rather tipsy if you get what i mean(

paralysedbyinertia · 02/06/2021 23:58

Meh. His vocabulary sounds a bit limited, but it is just words.I think it's important to pick your battles with teenagers, and this is not a hill that I would choose to die on.

The key questions here for me would be a)is he swearing at people with the intention of being offensive, or is he just swearing as a form of self expression. I would not accept the former but couldn't get worked up about the latter. And b) is he able to edit his speech appropriately around people outside his immediate family? In other words, does he know when he needs to turn it off, and if so, can he do that consistently? If yes, I wouldn't worry about what he says in the safety of his own home. If no, then that's what you need to address.

SUSIESUSAN123 · 31/08/2021 18:51

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LegendaryReady · 31/08/2021 18:58

I'm sure my teens swear with their friends but they wouldn't dream of doing it in front of me.

18yo DS was recounting his day at dinner and said something along the lines of "and that kind of shit".

The look of horror on his face when he realised it had popped out in front of his mum was a picture

There's a time and a place and with parents and GPs isn't it IMO. I'm not particularly offended by it btw, but it is vitally important that they can control it when they need to. Too many people can't

LegendaryReady · 31/08/2021 18:59

I used to get them to explain what these workds meant and explain the perils of using words they didn't understand. (Mostly being embarrassed by your mum).

RobinWoodPrinceofLeaves · 31/08/2021 19:03

Maybe get a swear jar? Each time someone swears they put in £1 - you included. Maybe deduct from pocket money if they get. At the end of the week/month, use it for a meal out for all of you?

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