Christ - anyone else feel like parenting teens is a thankless miserable soul destroying confidence zapping experience?
I had two lovely boys and we sailed through parenting until they were 14ish. They were charming, engaging, doing well at school and happy and I thought I was bloody mother of the decade. These days the 14 yr old is just locked in his room screaming at FIFA all day long, hard to engage in anything and won’t do the smallest tasks unless I screech at him. The 16 yr is disengaged from school, failing all his A’levels (despite being very bright) social media obsessed and now going out drinking and secretly decanting all our spirits to take with him. Both make it perfectly clear that they would rather stick pins in their eyes than spend any time with me.
I feel like I have turned into a screeching banshee who can do no right and am an utter parenting failure, particularly with the eldest as he is about to balls up his a levels and no one can get through to him.
It is like being a weeble - you get knocked down/rejected/ignored constantly but are expected to just bounce back up again and carry on. I’m tired of it all. The thanklessness of it, the lack of getting anything back, the soul destroying nature of it. Mainly it is the crushing sense of failure and the self doubt - am I the mean mum? Am I giving them too much freedom? Is it my fault? Have I put too much pressure on? Have I not put enough pressure on? Are they depressed? Should I give them space? Have they got too much space?
Just miserable times.
Hats off to all of you with engaged charming hard working teens but I hate you all.