Difficult daughter

[Islander82]

I am really struggling to connect with my 12 year old daughter just now. She goes through weeks at a time of being moody to the point of avoidance, refusing to interact with others, including friends and family.

She's always been a really loving a caring girl, but this seemed to change when she started menstruating. She is still close to me, confides her 'problems' etc. She still sometimes wants to do things like art together. Then she just goes in the is really black mood where she won't talk to anyone or even be in the same room.

I want to help her, but continually get, 'nothings wrong' or 'go away'. Can anyone help? Feeling like a parenting failure right now.

When she is in one of those moods. Ask her if there is anything you can do to make her happier. (Starbucks frapachino)

I'm having very similar problems. She literally just said to me "Just because your mother doesn't mean I like spending time with you." She just wants to hang out with her friends "going out" or shut herself away in her room watching youtubers and playing Minecraft.

Like yours, my daughter used to be a loving, caring little girl. She still confides in me and comes to me for a goodnight hug. But then when she's angry with me she will make such hurtful comments like the one above. I did get an apology but only after we'd both calmed down and I went and told her how much it had upset me.

I too feel like a parenting failure right now. Someone please reassure me this will pass?!!!

• "Just because you're my mother...."

Hang in there, just coming out the other side, daughter is just shy of 17 and is on her way out of it and coming back to her previous form.

My dd is the same, she is 16, i feel your pain x

Mine is starting to go into this phase. I've started reading a book called Untangled by Lisa Damour that has been really useful and helps me to understand why she is the way she is and not to take things so personally.

Thanks everyone. It's a relief to hear we're not the only ones, as it's easy to think you're getting it wrong! I will also check out that book thanks. 😊