Caught between teens, ex and partner

[Tulip555]

Hi.
I have been divorced from my kids dad for 9 years (they’re 16 and 19 now) and all has been fine and formally amicable. I have been with my partner for 7 (he does not live with us) and everyone gets on.
They go to their dads every other weekend - but over the past few months they have been resisting. I have tried to placate things and also to stick to the timings. Lockdown hasn’t helped. We are at the point where they refuse to go but will not face their father about it - basically it’s his personality that drives them mad and they don’t want to hurt his feelings. Meantime my partner feels he is losing time with me and is really putting the pressure on. I feel totally stuck in the middle and fairly powerless and have had enough! Anyone had something similar?

Can't you go to your partners for time alone?

If they dont want to go then they are old enough to make that decision. Would they they happier with a day out with dad instead of overnights?

Could your partner not come over while kids are there?

Certainly at their ages they can make their own decisions about staying over at their dad's. Personally I am not surprised at their age they do not want to be dictated to about where they spend their weekends.
Why can you not spend the night at your partners instead?