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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

DS14 completely lovesick

5 replies

whataboutbob · 10/02/2021 13:36

DS14 has been closed in on himself, not communicating, moody/ angry, neglecting personal hygiene for weeks. Doing absolute bare minimum in school or even less ( he has previously been effortlessly academic and generally aces all exams- not boasting, just for context). Now coming back with grades below 40%, etc. Won’t switch his camera on during lessons despite teachers requests, etc ( previously always respectful of authority figures). He has now told us he was in a relationship with a girl, it was great, but she suddenly broke it off. On the day it happened he was in floods of tears ( but didn’t tell us why). This has caught me by surprise. He is still in contact via shared internet platforms ( closed platforms with other mutual friends). Plus I’m sure they text, WhatsApp etc. My worries are that 1) he’s still hoping to win her back and is constantly in contact via e platforms, and there will be more drawn out emotional pain 2) he is so distracted that his studies really are suffering. My line so far has been total emotional support without being over bearing. Thanking him for sharing with me. Not raising the issue of dropped academic standards. However this needs to be tackled and I plan to raise it with him during half term. Any suggestions as to the way forward most welcome. Thanks for reading!

OP posts:
peak2021 · 10/02/2021 18:59

One step could be that if he continues to neglect personal hygiene, no young woman will ever be interested in him. Or just tackle lack of hygiene for any reason you can think of.

Andi2020 · 10/02/2021 19:24

Young love is so hard on them when it ends. It probably more difficult in lockdown when they can't meet other people to take their minds off it. So that is what he needs from you and family. Watch a movie cook together his choice. Get him to write a menu off what he would like to eat and cook. Play xbox playstation with him.
Ask him about other friends.

whataboutbob · 10/02/2021 21:36

Thanks for your suggestions. @peak2021 right now he Donets seem to care about attracting anyone else, he’s still pining, plus he doesn’t go out so he’s not bothered. I agree @Andi2020 he needs to take his mind off it, He is so distracted he only seems to manage small amounts of activity. But I’ll ask him to choose a recipe and cook it at the weekend, he used to enjoy that. He’s mostly into Minecraft and we don’t have an Xbox but he used to enjoy monopoly, heck I’ll pay his big brother to play with us if that’s what it takes.

OP posts:
Andi2020 · 10/02/2021 22:03

Saw this it might interest you to,take his mind off a girl. Hope I TV attached ok.

DS14 completely lovesick
karenhobson43 · 15/02/2021 17:32

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