DS speech - he's dropping ts, and sounding rough 😓

[fuschia2000]

DS 15 doesn't sound like us anymore - he listens to lots of YouTube football chat I think and is dropping ts everywhere, using some rough slang - what would you do? Constantly nagging just feels awful and is exhausting 😪 😞 😓

My mum is Scottish and used to berate me and my brother for saying 'droring' for 'drawing' (she pronounced it 'drah-ing!'). We grew up in the Welsh borders, where it's definitely not pronounced drah-ing

It still annoys me all these years later that my mum used to correct my pronunciation and criticise my handwriting (which is 👌 btw). It was her way or the highway.

I went on to get a degree from Oxford so my countryside accent didn't stand in my way.

I did this as a teen, the more my parents complained the more I did it.

I started because I wanted to fit in with friends, but I did eventually grow out of it.

And I'm going to have to keep reminding myself of this once my kids hit their teens.

😂😂😂

My son went through a stage of speaking like a teen and I couldn’t understand a word of it. They all spoke like that when I heard his friends - sounded terrible imo but he got over it and now speaks really nicely I think it’s something they do/try out. My mum is a stickler for ‘speaking properly’ so I tried not to be too critical and just reminded him when he’s in the house he’s speaking to me not his friends. 15 year old now the same and I’m sure my 2 younger boys will do it too.

Do accept a level of respect in your home and good behaviour out of it too but I don’t think it’s a bad thing to let them speak to their friends how they want. I do hate the mumbly shit my current teen is doing though constantly asking him to repeat himself and open his mouth so we can actually decipher wtf he’s saying but then he huffs and storms up to his room. Peace I suppose will he glad of the day I can hear what he’s saying again

Don't worry.

Our children grew up parliami broadest Glaswegian to disguise their English DNA. It hasn't held them back at all (or us) and we can still understand each other.

He'll grow out of it. When mine was 15 he talked like he was from Sarf Landan innit bruv. Took to calling me cuz and fam😂

Talks like a normal person now.

Yes he sounds like this JohnMcclane - Sarf London exactly !!! 🤣

Copy him. Teenagers love doing things their parents do.

My parents used to pull me up on my pronunciation all the time as a teenager (in Stoke).

Now I've lived in the Home Counties for 20 years and pull them up on theirs which they absolutely love

He’s register shifting! An important skill we all need and have to varying degrees.
It’s a typical teenager thing and at the moment he’s adopting it at home as a marker of independence, but with friends he is just fitting in to their culture and not being a “posh weirdo”.
He’ll be perfectly capable of adapting his language further in the future to suit his needs then; he’ll probably revert to close to how you speak, but if not, wherever his Ts end up, it’s likely to be working for him, not against him.

I would just continue to talk to him as you always have; ask him to translate when you really don’t understand; and ask him to modify his language around any elderly relatives it might confuse or upset.

If you make it a big thing he might avoid talking to you and you don’t want that with a teen.

I know what you mean op..drives me mad! My dd14 has started saying ‘them’ instead of ‘those’ as in ‘mum have we got any of them chocolates I like?’ It winds me up as she’s just copying her best friend and has basically morphed into her! What can you do? Apparently I was the same according to my mum

I do correct DS, but in a poking fun kind of way.

I went to a school where there no Hs or Ts, although that was never how we spoke at home. I have to concentrate really hard not to do it, even now. Once you aquire the habit, it's really hard to break and, like it or not, it does affect how people perceive you, especially in a professional capacity.

I just try and remind DS that it's not a habit he wants get stuck with.

My DD occasionally uses American words or pronunciations that shes picked up off tiktok - we take the piss out of her whenever she does it and it seems to annoy her into stopping. If its just being less well spoken than you'd like then leave him alone - it will probably pass and even it not it really doesn't matter

“No bad language” HA! He’s 15!

Mine used to code switch when they were in primary school.
Beautiful standard English at home, broad Lancashire in the street.
A friend of my nephew used to talk like he was from the Hood, and I remember his girlfriend saying in withering, cut-glass tones ‘Just stop it Oliver, you’re from Basingstoke for heaven’s sake’,
He’ll find his own level, but it might be worth pointing out that you’d like him to ‘talk proper’ at home. It’s helpful if he can remember how when it comes to job interviews.

It's a phase don't worry. My DD is the same, it's Fam this and You Get Me that.

Just try not to notice..

@SimonJT

Copy him. Teenagers love doing things their parents do.

I got myself two nose piercings and dyed my hair blue for six months.

Can confirm that both DDs have sought to emulate me by always having natural colour hair and no piercings.

Get use to it, my teenagers have invented a whole new language which I'm finally getting to grips with!

We either take the piss (and it’s received the right way) or pretend we don’t understand. Also, had discussions that it’s acceptable to change the way you speak to fit in with friends but needing to fit in with us too.

@Gatehouse77

We either take the piss (and it’s received the right way) or pretend we don’t understand. Also, had discussions that it’s acceptable to change the way you speak to fit in with friends but needing to fit in with us too.

I don't have teenagers But find this attitude a bid mean. Would you do this to an adult or other person? I don't know if its because parents still view their teens as children? But the lack of respect shown for them on mumsnet is so sad.

@Gatehouse77

We either take the piss (and it’s received the right way) or pretend we don’t understand. Also, had discussions that it’s acceptable to change the way you speak to fit in with friends but needing to fit in with us too.

I always take a celebrity or famous person they like and say how much they ould hate that type of pronunciation. Usually works.

Beautiful standard English at home, broad Lancashire in the street.

^

What's your point?

This drives me mad as well. Which is one reason my son does it. I can't resist repeating it back to him sarcastically which really angers him.
You get me, cuz. Imma talk like a road man, bruv, even though my crib's in a Hampshire village innit, blud.

There's a good episode of Harry Enfield's Kevin the Teenager when the kids suddenly abandon their Surrey accents and start talking like Liam Gallagher.

@grassisjeweled

Beautiful standard English at home, broad Lancashire in the street.

^

What's your point?

That we lived in the arse end of a rough town in the NW, and my children learnt a vital survival skill that helped them blend in? That children speak differently with their friends to how they speak with family?