Should we give incentives?

[Rosebud2005]

Do any of you give rewards for passing units and exams?

No.
But it depends on what motivates your own kid.

Suppose it depends on how you operate as a family. We've always given gifts for a good school report. Some friends do and others don't. Someone I know bought her son a car this summer for passing his GCSEs. We've never spent huge amounts on the gifts but every family has different budgets I suppose.

Small amount it gives them something to aim for If they not a natural at studying

I give incentives for working and trying ...

For last set of tests (pre Covid) a duvet day post exams, no questions asked, take a day off school was promised! (But learning / studying had to be done for tests prior to this)

I incentivise working for tests, doing work needed (not grade related) - however rewards are not huge .... money to go and have bubble tea with friend, £5 to spend in primark - in that vein

My child is motivated by these small rewards

No. I have taught my child to take pride in what she does and to work hard so that she fulfills her own potential. I think intrinsic motivation is much more important than extrinsic.

She is in her GCSE year right now, and she is working incredibly hard, but she is doing it for herself, and not for me.

If you haven't passed on those values to your child already, it's probably a bit late to start in the teenage years. If I was going to reward a child who lacked intrinsic motivation, I would definitely focus on rewarding effort rather than outcomes, as a previous poster has suggested.

No. I don’t want dd1 to have any more pressure on her than she already is putting on herself. The promise of rewards would just make her even more stressed about achieving top grades (which is the target she’s set herself).

Of course I will treat her once it’s all over anyway, but for now she doesn’t need the added pressure.

She is very self motivated though and wants to achieve for the sake of her own future. When I was at school I may have tried harder for the promise of cash! Kids are all different.

No.
Far better to work on teaching them intrinsic motivation.

How do you teach intrinsic motivation? There are so many other factors: personality, peer pressure...
I’ve been battling with one dc for years and now they’re yr9 I realised all I can do is make them do the work. But I don’t seem to be able to make them care.
Other younger dc just wants to do it. They WANT to do well and I don’t have to ever convince them to do their homework.
Both are doing very well at school. But one does need incentives - which I now offer,
I don’t care if they’re working hard for me or because ‘intrinsic motivation’ at this stage.
My job is to help them achieve the best they can with and not waste their abilities.
After that it’s up to them but at least they’ll have good grades behind them.
I know ultimately older dc is money motivated and industrious in other ways, and that will serve them well when they’re older,

It depends entirely on the child

I needed no motivation. Absolutely none because I was fiercely driven to excel.

My brother however needed a material motivation

We, as adult, work for money.
Some teens see school work in the way and so need the notice ruin if something material, just as many of us need the notice ruin if money to come to work

@Andi2020

Small amount it gives them something to aim for If they not a natural at studying

Mine isn't a natural scholar but extrinsic motivation has never worked to make him do more than the minimum required either.

@BackforGood

No. Far better to work on teaching them intrinsic motivation.

Not something that can be “taught”

As indeed your inclusion of the word “intrinsic” indicates

No, but we have always given a token to recognise if their behaviour scores were good on their reports. We have kids who have done very well but we have never ever pushed for grades and I think once parents do, they demotivate their children or make them feel that grades matter more than their own self. We did discuss with one child when they were underperforming due to not trying in a subject, but we just said it was their choice but to think it through. They pulled their finger out fortunately but it was their choice.

Interestingly the youngest has a teacher who in tests now rewards evidence of revision effort more than the grade received, and this is proving very motivating - this has basically been our approach all along.

No. I know some do but it doesn’t sit well with me. We will take her out for a celebration meal of her choice after her exams (if within guidance). She was motivated by a 6th form two weeks ago in some mini mocks in maths and English but although her mocks start this Friday she didn’t seem to do much work this weekend unfortunately. I am tired of hassle with her if she doesn’t want to do it for herself by now she has learned nothing from us.

Just to be clear the celebration is to celebrate then end of GCSE’s not the actual results.

It baffles me why anyone would have an issue with this.

Don’t we work for monetary reward? Or would you do it purely for.... what?

@Rolopolo2000

It baffles me why anyone would have an issue with this.

Don’t we work for monetary reward? Or would you do it purely for.... what?

Because some kids will work their socks off and still not get the right grades.

I was rewarded for grades, it massively motivated me.

Rewarded ours for effort as more appropriate for their differing academic ability.

Yes I absolutely do. My son hates school. For him going to school is like doing a job you absolutely hate. You wouldn't do it unless you got paid. In a perfect world all children would be inspired to go to school, learning would be fun and engaging, the teachers would be enthusiastic but we are in the real world where education is test upon test, being spoon fed information. Children are not taught how to access information they are spoon fed a bunch of facts to pass an exam.

Just to be clear I reward the effort going in and not the grade.

I think people who only work for monetary reward are often a bit unfulfilled (I know people who are financially successful but say openly they are unhappy with their careers) and I would hope to see my children feel fulfilled both at school and as adults. It doesn't always work out like that of course, but I couldn't tell my children that all that matters is money because I don't believe that myself. I would do something different if I didn't need money at all, but I chose my work because I like it. I want my children to like their work if possible. If they need money they will presumably work for that of course, as I have at times.

@Rolopolo2000

It baffles me why anyone would have an issue with this.

Don’t we work for monetary reward? Or would you do it purely for.... what?

I have a job in order to earn money. I do it well because I take pride in it, I like the satisfaction of a job well done and feeling competent, and it's ultimate better for my own career if I put the effort in.

The school/job analogy falls apart really because school is entirely for the pupil's benefit. Therefore, extrinsic motivation is even less applicable.

I believe research has shown that extrinsic motivation only works for simple, repetitive work like an assembly line. It actually damages motivation for more complex tasks, and can lead people to focus on the short term at the expense of the bigger picture.

My parents offered me this for my GCSEs and I felt insulted and turned it down not that I was that diligent a pupil, but I wasn't for sale!

I absolutely do not believe that an unmotivated child will suddenly start working if you promise money for passing exams.

I have teens and have watched them struggle to knuckle down and get work done. We telling them that they would get £50 per 9 grade for example simple isn't going to work at the grind of day by day revision.

better is mini incentives - shall I make you a hot chocolate when you have finished that? Less an incentive, more a support.
Also, nothing wrong with rewarding hard work after the event, in other words, once exams or results are over, saying we are proud of how hard you worked and want to give you something is quite different to trying to get them to work harder for money.

I don't, as an adult work for financial reward actually. I would find it soul detroying. I do a job I like. At the moment I do it pro bono for a charity most of the time.
Yes, we all have to work to pay the rent, we do work because we need money, but that isn't usually the best way to get good results form anyone

Yes we did for our son. He disliked academic study but needed to get his minimum 3As still. Incentive was highly motivating for him.
His intrinsic motivation is better where he can see practical applications to the learning and has built post school. Without the in-school success he wouldn’t have his career or have the confidence around learning he now has.

The girls didn’t need it. They had reward not incentive.

I absolutely do not believe that an unmotivated child will suddenly start working if you promise money for passing exams.

This way of thinking is so dogmatic and narrow

Some will, some won’t

@Rolopolo2000

*I absolutely do not believe that an unmotivated child will suddenly start working if you promise money for passing exams. *

This way of thinking is so dogmatic and narrow

Some will, some won’t

well, as it is backed by every piece of research into this, I don't think so.