This has knocked me sideways. He always seemed a happy, chilled teenager. But he came to me a few weeks ago and said he was feeling down. We had a good chat and he felt better for it. I asked that we revisit how he was feeling a few weeks later and if he wanted we could see what other options might be available (counselling, etc.). He said he’d see how he went.
Fast forward to now and he’s been having stress headaches, and to my shock, had badly self harmed, cutting his arm quite a bit. It was his sister who voiced her concerns as she said she’d heard him sobbing in his room about a year ago and went to investigate. He had self harmed then too but not as badly. She helped put a plaster on and said if he did it again she’d tell Mum. She had noticed drops of blood on the bath mat and so told me. The following day I watched him like a hawk and noticed he was covering up his arm and seemed very withdrawn. I kept reassuring him and asking if he was ok. He wouldn’t say but I could tell he was bothered. Finally I sat with him in his room and said I wasn’t leaving until he told me what was bothering him. I coaxed it out of him and eventually got his arm and pulled his sleeve up. I was shocked at the amount he’d cut himself though the cuts weren’t deep. But I just held his hand and reassured him I was just worried and he could tell me anything.
He said he just felt in a dark space and didn’t know what to do to make himself happy or what he was doing with his life or what his purpose was. I just kept reassuring him and said that I think he should speak with someone who could help him with all of this.
Roll on a few more days and he’s still withdrawn and says he just wants to work through it himself. I am at my wits end and terrified he does something worse or bottles everything up. I’ve tried talking to him but he just dismissed it and says let’s not talk about it.
So I’ve sent him some links to self help pages.
What else can I do? Should I mention it to his school? He’d be horrified that I had.
I’ve also learned that he had told his mate about it who had encouraged him to speak to me. His mate also spoke to his sister saying he was worried about him and to look out for him.
My gorgeous wee lad is in an unhappy place and I’m so worried about him.
Please any advice, handholding, anything most welcome