Paying a Contribution to the house

[MissMaple82]

I'm a single mother to two children, aged 17 & 4. The 17 year old started an apprenticeship last year. I work part time and claim working tax & child tax credits. Since my eldest turned 17 i've lost nearly all my housing benefit and council tax benefit due to him no longer being a dependent and leaving education, and i'm struggling!
I can manage but nowhere near as comfortably as I used to, it means watching every pound and penny, and I can no longer afford to save. As a result I've decided to ask my eldest to contribute towards the bills. They earn £160 a week on the apprenticeship. I suppose i'm asking for people's opinions on what is an acceptable amount to ask a 17 year old to contribute. They say they are happy to pay, however I do feel some guilt about taking it.
Are there any other working teens that pay board and if so how much? And how do you manage it without any issues?

I think it’s absolutely fine to ask for a contribution, especially as they are agreeable to it.

I used to pay 30% when i lived at home. So about £50/£60 a week..?

Just realised I've posted twice 🤦‍♀️ apologies . Can't figure out how to delete?

I think it's fine if you genuinely need the money. But somewhat unfair if you want them to subsidise your choice to only work part time.

@TrainspottingWelsh I'm not using them to subsidise my choice to not work full time!, I work 4 days a week school hours which some can only dream of, and I'm not willing to work full time as I choose to be there for my young child who I have sole care as her father is not involved. Besides that, I have a good job which I enjoy so I'm happy where I am. In the eyes of the government he's classed as an adult, he's earning a wage and i've lost income as a result.

Is the £160/week after expenses such as his travel, mobile, lunches etc. He also needs money to clothe himself, toiletries etc.

Once that is all off, how much does he have left to see friends/workmates?

As a parent I would be expecting to at least partially fund him through his apprenticeship, any contribution would be a token amount.

If finances are really so tight, I would ask to contribute towards some groceries, maybe tv/internet. Would expect them to fund their own travel, phone, etc., but wouldn't charge a child to live at home.

When I started working I paid my own travel, phone, clothes, toiletries and 1/3 of the shopping. How much are you losing? Would it be worth them covering that?

Start by working out what it is costing you to have them there.

Next look at the unquantifiable impact, so they help run the household, cook, clean be generally useful so that the burden on you is less ? Or do they add to the burden of running a house as well as actually host money.

How does the absolute cost compare to what they earn. It should be a minimum and I would adjust according to how much they help.

It's not easy for young adults. In an ideal world I would save what they BB pay to give them when they leave. But then I never lived at home, getting my own place however grim was my priority.

I guess your son could always get an evening job if he wanted a bit more cash. I’d suggest 50 a week. Or 40 if you could afford that

Their wage is £160, they have their top of the range mobile phone paid for each month by their dad, lifts to and from work every day by myself and grandad, so all money is their own. And it's not rent it's money to contribute towards the living costs as in the eyes of the law I don't need to financially support them or provide for them anymore, hence my loss of benefits for them!

I would never charge a child to live in their family home. Perhaps he could help with groceries. Teens his age tend to be big eaters.

My 19yr old ds earns £250 a week working fulltime and pays me £30. He also has a car to run so isnt too put out for this small contribution and it helps with the housekeeping.

I've decided on £25 p/w and they are more than happy to help. And I lost nearly all housing benefit and council tax benefit. ive lost almost 400 a month!!!

It's nice that he is willing to pay so don't feel guilty, it's learning experience for when he's older 😉 £35 -40 a week is a reasonable amount. Especially as your also giving him lifts to work. If it ends up to much or to little for whatever reason you can always adjust the amount to better suit.

I don't know how soon this will happen but once your son reaches 18 that will mean there are 2 adults in the house and your council tax will increase too as you will lose your "single" occupier discount.

If he is still an apprentice and earning less than £195 per week (please check your council tax website) he will be exempt so make sure you apply for the exemption. Just wanted to give you a heads up in case he turned 18 soon. I would contact them in advance of this but nearer to his birthday.

Of course your older child should contribute. He's earning a wage and you're struggling, seems like a no brainer to me. Lots of young people seem so entitled these days, it's no wonder when some parents are horrified at the thought of them paying their way at home.