19yo DD has to get up for work at 4am a couple of days a week, so likes to be asleep around 8pm the night before. She's complained a few times when she couldn't get to sleep bc it was too noisy, so we've made an effort to be a bit quieter - we don't creep about whispering or anything like that... but I'm conscious she's trying to sleep so I try to encourage DH/DS not to play loud music / shout up the stairs / have loud conversations / slam doors etc.
Last night DH was cooking & used a very noisy hand blender at 9.30 & I just knew it would disturb her and it did. DD appears & shouts/cries about being woken up & that she's trying to sleep. I start to apologise then DH shouts up at her that he's "sick of living like a monk" just to accommodate her 😕 he so rarely loses his rag it gave me a real shock.
The thing is I'm quite happy not to play loud music for a couple of evenings a week & it's only really noise in the kitchen that's a problem as it travels up to her room. I can see this being an ongoing problem & totally dread another confrontation 🙁 Am I being too accommodating to DD, or is DH right & she's being unreasonable?
Reading this back it sounds like a such a petty 'first world problem' type of thing! but I hate conflict so much & it makes me feel physically sick when people get angry. I try to be a peacemaker but I feel like I end up explaining to each of them how the other one feels or why they did something. They do love each other & generally get on fine, but they sometimes really don't really 'get' each other. We hardly ever argue in the family & this has really thrown me 😢