If you gave your teen some cash to spend on her holiday

[differentname]

And she said thank you at the time of receiving it, would you expect/hope for another acknowledgment later along the lines of "spent the money at a restaurant, was great, thanks again"?

No. If I have given someone money as a gift, there are no strings attached about what they spend it on. I don’t want an update on what they bought and expecting extra thank you messages or informing people where the money went is needy and ridiculous.

No. MIL did something like this recently (we aren't teenagers though!). Bought us something for our new home, and we thanked her profusely when we got it. However, she sent a snotty message to DP a few weeks later saying how disappointed she was that she never got a thank you when we used it?! Bizarre behaviour.

If it were my child I wouldnt. In the scenario you describe I would appreciate it and I think it would be polite to at least talk about the holiday in general.

Next time, when you give the gift you could say 'I'd really like to hear all about it' when you're back.

Oops sorry - you haven't said whether it's your teen or not.

I agree with @squanderedcore

No. What do you want? Saying thank you repeatedly? As long as they say Thank you when it's given, that's enough. We have ds money for his skiing trip with school earlier this year and he said Thank you and that was that. He bought us a couple of little gifts but we didn't quiz him on what he'd spent his money on.

@Palavah

If it were my child I wouldnt. In the scenario you describe I would appreciate it and I think it would be polite to at least talk about the holiday in general.

Next time, when you give the gift you could say 'I'd really like to hear all about it' when you're back.

This is different surely? I tell my parents about my holiday and, when DD is old enough to go on holiday by herself, I’ll want to hear about it but I won’t quiz her on what she spent her money on.

No! The money ( like any gift ) was given for the enjoyment of the receiver.

Honestly- if you gave someone a Nespresso for Christmas, would you expect a text every morning- " Just had the skinny latte, it wouldn't have been possible without you, THANK YOU!!"

I suspect not.
😄

No. I'd think it weird to expect more than one thank you.

Never seen such a clear cut AIBU

@Somethingkindaoooo

No

No

No

Is this a grandparents thing?

Nope!

I don't understand how she'd even know what she'd spent it on to tell you anyway.

Surely she would have just put it with the rest of her money and not be able to distinguish?

YABU

I don't understand how she'd even know what she'd spent it on to tell you anyway

Most teenagers keep a separate ledger for gifted funds, surely?

OP, if yours doesn't, perhaps that's where you went wrong with her.

@LonginesPrime

Just LOL.

Lol ok this is pretty unanimous! I'm not worked up about it and haven't said anything and of course don't expect separate funds but was just wondering if other teens would be likely to say send a picture of a meal out or something with an accompanying line.
But hey, nbd as my teen would say!

No.
Were you expecting an audit trail, fully documented with receipts ?

No,

But an itemised list of what was spent and where, wouldn't go amiss, along with a short essay on the highs and lows of the holiday with perhaps a special section on how beneficial the monetary gift had been.

Photos of any items bought with the money.

A daily diary (could be submitted in the form of a blog).

A tasteful souvenir from the holiday (but not a bale of tea towels!)

Perhaps a bouquet of flowers from the teen on their return and maybe a meal out.

But I wouldn't want them to feel they had to all of this, I'm not like that.

No but I would ask her what she spent it on.

No

Some people do say thanks or show appreciation more than once, it is not necessary, and tends to be when a thoughtful gift has been bought and they say they have enjoyed using it, certainly not a parent giving a child some holiday cash.

but was just wondering if other teens would be likely to say send a picture of a meal out or something with an accompanying line.

No! I give my DC spending money all the time. It would be a bit weird if they me a picture and a thank you every time they spent some of it. Like some everlasting gratitude 😳

I wouldn't expect it but my DD would probably give a 2 hour non-stop talk on how she spent it with no interruptions allowed. It's likely to involve hair dye and there would be 200 questions on my opinions on hair dye which having never dyed my hair I struggle to answer. Not sure that's an improvement on nothing.