13yr old Jekyll & Hyde
Wipingsides · 29/07/2020 22:44
Finding it increasingly hard to cope with the many personalities of my soon to be 13 yr old DD. It’s like single white female here & worse since lockdown obvs too.. one minute she adores me.. literally attached to my side, demanding cuddles & saying how wonderful I am. She is very clingy and wants to do everything with me - which she pretty much has for months now. Never mind these stories of puppies getting separation anxiety, she will be bereft when she needs to go back to school in September. Then she switches and throws the most cutting hurtful comments at me for literally no reason! This happens most days - she’s very negative about most things and then can get personal, she hates everything I say/ do/ wear..& it’s like she’s seeing how rude she can be so when I eventually pull her up, I’m being ‘mean’ and ‘don’t love her’...But I can’t let her talk to me in the way she does it’s so disrespectful. I’ve never been in an abusive relationship & don’t mean to be flippant but I seriously feel like I’m being psychologically abused by my own child!?! I give myself a talking to & read up on ‘teens’ to understand this behaviour and try to rise above it but it’s really chipping away at me and tonight I totally lost it with her.. resulting in many tears (Her) and much guilt (me)
I’ve tried talking to her reasonably about it but the same cycles of behaviour continue.
My question is, is this ‘normal’ or is it worth considering some kind of ‘talking therapy’ for her/ me?!
Strawberry33 · 04/10/2020 19:16
Hi 🙋♀️ I’m new and I’m on here looking for the same answers really with my 11 year old son.
Very similar issues. How are you doing now?
Marie84 · 04/10/2020 22:58
My 13 yr old dd is the same. I also had a 15 yr old dd who was the same but she has come out the other side now! My 13 yr old dd is taller than me and can be very intimidating which seems ridiculous! I quite often quote her the rhyme "there was a little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead, when she was good she was very very good and when she was bad she was horrid" I'm pretty sure it was wrote for her! Anyway I'm hoping she grows out of it just like her sister did 🤞 it's hard and my partner works long hours so I feel I'm doing it on my own which makes things worse. Hopefully it's just a phase.
malificent7 · 05/10/2020 12:40
Dd who is 12 is the same...can be very mean to me ...abusive but if I pull her up on it tjen i am a monster.
Oh....and she is impossible to parent too.
mamabluestar · 05/10/2020 21:05
No advice, I just wanted to say that it's a very similar story here too
OldAndWornOut · 05/10/2020 21:08
I feel out of my depth sometimes.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.