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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

DS2 (14) has gone to a party, got legless on tequila and been ambulanced to A&E

57 replies

WendyWeber · 29/09/2007 00:34

I'm just waiting for DS1 to get in from DJing in a local pub and then we'll go and fetch him.

Do we kill him there or wait till we get him home? (DS1 told him to be careful with booze. I want to know where the tequila came from )

OP posts:

harleyd · 29/09/2007 12:19

i did it with a bottle of malibu i took from my dads drinks cabinet at 14, havent been able to drink malibu since.
let him get through the hangover and then make him realise how stupid he has been. it will probably put him off for another couple of years anyway

Blu · 29/09/2007 12:23

Sympathies to you, WW, hope you got soe sleep.

No experience of parenting teenagers, but thinking back to my own 14-year old misadventures, I would be serious with him but not condemnatory, speak to other parents involved, find out where and why 14 year-olds had accesss to tequila. (beer and cider being one thing, tequila another).

Good that someone called an ambulance, though. Who was it, another teenager, or an adult? I think all the adults of young teenagers present should know what happened - it could have been any of them who drank tequila, after all, and teenagers always do things as a group effort, don't they?

Anyway, you are a seasoned parent of teenage boys - all you really need from us is a cyber freshly squeezed juice and a collective "drag him through the mire and back!", isn't it?

edam · 29/09/2007 12:30

Hope everything's OK and you have enjoyed a richly-deserved lie in today.

Daft sod. Agree the Tony Blair 'I'm so disappointed...' line is prob. the way to go.

marthamoo · 29/09/2007 12:33

I hope he's OK this morning. Did you go with Extremely Disappointed? I think that would be my approach too (and my ds1 is just 3.5 years away from being 14 so maybe I'd better start practising...)

Original poster

WendyWeber · 29/09/2007 12:35

Well, the A&E sister admits that they do get an awful lot of this and 14-16 is the prime age for it - in fact there were 15-16 year olds in the neighbouring rooms. Luckily it was a quiet night otherwise! She also said it's OK to let this pass once (she has a young teenage daughter herself, who got quite drunk on cider aged about 12 - they made her go to the zoo at 9am next day, spending lots of time in the elephant house )

She also said that although he was the only one brought in, a few others had been carted off by their parents in a similar state. His friends had been trying to get hold of DS1 before me but he hadn't had his phone with him (but as he can't drive I don't know what they thought he could have done about it) The police had been called twice by aggrieved neighbours but although there was clearly no adult present they had no authority to stop it?

When we saw him he was a total mess, unconscious, covered in puke, with wet pants, and on a drip (which was v good for him today, he had a total of 1.5L which rehydrated him nicely without having to be puked up again). He has a few scrapes and bruises and has lost his specs (has no spare pair, not sure what we'll do about school)

They got him on his feet at about 2.30 - they needed DS1's help though, because he was a bit stroppy and swore at and slapped the nurse who was removing the drip (she was very good about it, I am now but didn't know at the time)

He was actually quite funny in the car on the way home - to begin with he thought I was a taxi driver and DS1 was the friend whose party it was. Then when he'd got it straight, and worked out who we were and where we were going, he started rapturising about his bed with his blankie in it - and that he won't be sharing blankie with his children, they can get their own - I wish we could have taped that...

This morning he is rough, but not nearly as bad as he would have been without the drip. I've told him he won't be going to any more parties for quite a while and he looked relieved...he said he will never drink tequila again (mind you that still leaves lots of lovely alternatives)

Apparently the host's father is in New York for a few days; not sure if there is an older sibling, I can't imagine he'd have left a 14/15-yr-old alone. His mother is dead, according to DS2 in the car last night. DS2 doesn't remember any details so no idea where the tequila came from but maybe we'll have an inquiry in the next couple of days.

Thanks for all the moral support

OP posts:

MaureenMLove · 29/09/2007 12:44

Thank god he's ok. I'd go for the emotional tact too. No point in shouting now, it won't do any good. I have a feeling he's learnt a very important lesson, without you shouting!

Original poster

WendyWeber · 29/09/2007 12:49

Thanks, MML

Blu, you are so right about the ambulance, he was very lucky. I don't know who called it for him, but the thought of what can happen to people in an alcoholic stupor makes me shudder

OP posts:

suedonim · 29/09/2007 12:49

Omg, he sounds to have been in a really bad state, WW. It must have been frightening for you to see him like that.

In some ways, the fact he isn't suffering as badly as he might have done is not good, I think it reduces the impact of what he's done to himself.

But heyho, time to get the frying pan out and get that greasy bacon, eggs & black pudding on the go!!

Original poster

WendyWeber · 29/09/2007 12:53

Oh I do agree that the lesson would have been even more effective with a much worse hangover, sue - but he is very repentant anyway.

Incidentally he had 2 bags of saline and 1 of sugar solution, and the sister said that the sugar would stop him feeling nearly so bad today, which was news to me (and to DS1, who filed the information away for future ref)

OP posts:

StockbreederHoundsFish · 29/09/2007 12:57

Pleased that he's OK. And glad that you were able to snigger at blankie on the way home.

Does he know about the wet pants? I imagine that would mortify him into sobriety!

edam · 29/09/2007 12:59

Very good point from Stockbreeder.

Blu · 29/09/2007 12:59

I would definitely talk to the father of the host-boy.

I mean, he will presumably know that a party took place due to inadequate teenage cleaning operation and reports from aggrieved neighbours - but he should know that a child could have died on his premises, so that he knows the extent of what happened at this party.

By calling DS1 it sounds as if they were hoping to get it all sorted without parental knowledge!

Anyway, glad he is on the mend.

Have a berocca for yourself!

suedonim · 29/09/2007 13:11

Repentant is good - I trust you'll be milking that for all it's worth by guilting him into various chores around the house, hehe!

Interesting about the saline/sugar. That's a bit like giving ORT for diarrhoea, isn't it?

Miaou · 29/09/2007 13:59

so sorry to hear this WW - what a nightmare! I would spend some time telling him how many scary thoughts went through your head when you found out he was in hospital - guilt is definitely the way to appeal to his better nature

chopchopbusybusy · 29/09/2007 14:10

I'm fairly sure I'm right in saying that alcohol lowers blood sugar levels, hence the hunger that usually goes with a hangover. Being mumsnet though someone is bound to come along in a minute and contradict me

Glad your DS is safe and well. I probably wouldn't discuss it much more with him today - he's probably still a bit drunk anyway! Tomorrow though I'd fill him in on the wet pants and the conversation about the blankie.

Skyler · 29/09/2007 14:28

Def tell him about the wet pants. The whole thing sounds terrifying now you have said all that happened.

bumperlicious · 29/09/2007 14:58

That's really scary isn't it, what they can do to themselves.

My brother did this but his punishment was having to be taken home wrapped in a yellow hospital baby blanket!

dustystar · 29/09/2007 15:04

IIRC then its to do with Sugar (glucose) being the brains main source of energy. Drinking causes a lowering in blood sugar by interfering with the funtion of organs like the liver, kidneys and pancreas. This then contributes to the feeling of fatigue associated with hangover, as well as weakness and mood disturbance.

Spidermama · 29/09/2007 15:05

I remember my first proper alcohol experience and nearly dying on vodka. I've never ever got that pissed ever again because it was so horrible.

noddyholder · 29/09/2007 15:17

Omg I dread this and ds 13 is getting to taht age.(Spider I got your email but couldn't reply as i have moved and email keeps going funny would love tea and cake and a natter and of course I'll look at the fireplace)
I am petrified that ds will do this soon you sound really cool and calm i hope I will be like that.My brother did this and ended up out cold on someones lawn and my parents found hom unconscious but he still likes a skinful now so didn't deter him totally!

Original poster

WendyWeber · 29/09/2007 15:23

noddy, I was only cool and calm because luckily it was the ambulanceman who told me about DS2, rather than one of his friends, and he was totally calm and reassuring himself - if one of the friends had rung and said he'd gone off in an ambulance, I'd have had kittens!

OP posts:

Marina · 29/09/2007 15:27

Oh WW, every parent's nightmare. Loads of good advice on here and thanks actually for sharing this scare because I think it has given lots of us pause for thought about how we would react a few years down the line.
Have to say if this had happened in London or any other inner-city area the experience might have been rather more harrowing and the treatment possibly much more hard to come by.
Poor boy and poor you. Lots of love and relief that he's basically OK, and a quiet LOL at the blankie. Shades of Harvey the Pink Bunny there...XXX

NAB3 · 29/09/2007 15:28

God, we have all this to come.

Sound like you handled it very well and that he has learnt his lesson.

A word in the houseowners shell-like me thinks...

WideWebWitch · 29/09/2007 15:29

Oh god ww, I'm glad he's ok
how scary

ayashasky · 29/09/2007 15:30

Hi, I have two older teenagers and my daughter has come home worse for wear.She was actually sick in her berdroom.Fortunately for me/her(!?) she decided I would kill her if it was on the carpet.She opened the back window and duly performed. I was not a happy bunny the next day,nor was she.However part of the learning process is cleaning up afterwards! Unfortunately, the sick went down the wall and onto the security lamp! So she was out there with a bucket and ladder sorting it out. I have always made a distinction between sick and 'naughty' sick with the latter having to be cleaned up by the offender.
We can now laugh about it, but at the time I was pretty fed up and she definately knew how I felt about the whole episode.

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