Is it appropriate for my mum to track my phone if I'm 18?

[Kyle19]

Probably not the best place to post but it's the only thing I could think of.

I think my mum is struggling to accept the fact I'm now a grown man. She told me last night that she thinks I should go to bed earlier (I'm always asleep sometime between 11pm and 2am, which as far as I know is pretty normal for someone my age). She also said that she can see everything I do on my phone and when I'm doing it. I felt really uncomfortable when she said that as the first thing that popped into my head was that I watch a bit of porn sometimes. She paid for the phone itself and gave it to me as a Christmas gift and my Dad pays the Sky bill (I don't earn a wage as I'm still at college, they've both said they're happy to support me financially until I'm ready to do what I want to do, which I'm extremely grateful for).

I take into account that she paid for the phone so she's probably well within her rights to do this, but is it normal? Does anyone else do it with their 18 year olds? Really not sure wether I should say something to her or just deal with it until I can get myself a phone

She shouldn't be tracking it. I paid for my son's phone from the time he went to secondary school until he was 19/20 and could afford to pay for it himself. I kept an eye on it when he was younger (he didn't know that but it would have been negligent not to). Gradually less so as he got older. From about 16 not really and certainly not once 18. Having said that he's never given us any cause for concern. He wouldn't allow me on his fb but my sister was a friend so she used to tell me anything she thought I needed to know. Now I'm allowed on his fb because of course he hardly posts on it.

You are no longer a child and have a right to be treated as an adult. Sometimes though you have to act like an adult to force other people to treat you as such. So what would an adult do? Speaking as an adult myself, I would simply tell her I was not happy with it and I'd turn it off. No need to get drawn into arguments if you both treat each other with mutual respect and ultimately she needs to respect your privacy and accept that she cannot force something like this on you.

No, it is not appropriate.

The correct response to ‘I paid for it’ is ‘would you prefer me to leave education, get a job and pay my own way?’.

Most parents would not say yes to the above.

I’m 19, my mum would never do this to me. Have a look through settings and google as well, it’s probably fairly simple to disable

Haven’t looked at my older teens’ phones for years, but I do have location tracking on mainly so I can see if they have arrived somewhere safely, or on their way home.
I will probably take my daughters off when she goes to uni as I won’t have to pick her up from places!
We all have it for each other inc my husband too.